Take a look around... this is the last hour we have to see the Old World. Afterwards, we will only have our memories of what life was like before It Happened.

You mean, last one before it's shown. I'm so looking forward to the extended postmortem.

Yes. But it could still get cancelled, couldn't it?

You really think so? I doubt it. The button has been pressed, the missiles are flying, the man at the border post has lit his last cigarette, knowing that in the next few minutes he will head down in to the... oh, hang on, that's World War 3 I'm thinking of, isn't it? "Brass Eye Special" is merely a lewd TV show on Channel 4. How silly to get them mixed up in comparative importance...

The comedy paeodophile has been granted parole, that he might offend again.

What's a paedofiddle?

A poodofule is a man who likes to have sex in a childish way, e.g. with an ice cream.

Yesterday two plodophiles sold ice cream to –wait for it- kids in my street.
I'm as shocked as you are.

He was in an “ice cream van”

Him: “do you want bits in that?”
Me: “no thanks, in fact, your ice cream fiddles with kids. Perve”