>4. The BBC's exclusive renaming of Chromakey to Colour Seperation Overlay (for no discernable reason).

Yes, a wry smile certainly played about my lips when the lads down the pub laid that one on me.

Matthew Colling's Hello, Culture last night, Channel Four. Supposedly a series about romanticism in the arts, actually an excuse for speccy junior Mark Lawson to wander about telling us stories from his incredibly dull past, play guitar badly and spout pretentious/portentious non-sequitirs. You really must see this fool, you won't be disappointed. I heard a rumour Chris Morris has 2 cocks, does that make me one of them?

The Swedish Chemists' Shop.







(Sorry, misread thread title)

Yes he does have two cocks but according to CaB, you are not one of them.


http://chilled.cream.org/times240300.html

"One of them has the shape and texture of a burger patty."

Velvet Goldmine - a true masterpiece of unintended comedy genius.

Anything written by Emma Forrest and/or Bidisha.

Jeremy Paxman interviewing Bill Gates a couple of years ago on the now-aborted 'Paxman' show. Absolutely hilarious, considering how many counts you can get Gates on, and all Paxo could do was mutter on about porn on the web being his fault. It was like blaming Alexander Graham Bell for phone sex-lines. Gates looked delighted to be interviewed by such a moron.

Brian Sewell's entire personality. Lovely man.

> The Swedish Chemists' Shop

I don't get it.

Old Not The Nine O'Clock News gag. Here we go:

Great Old Chestnuts of our time, Number twelve. The Swedish Chemists' Shop.

Swede A: I wish to buy some deodorant please.

Swede B: Ball or Aerosol?

Swede A: Neither. I want it for my armpits.


(It only works if Rowan Atkinson is saying "aerosol" in an outrageous Swedish accent.)

Yes, Brian Sewell!! My god. Have you heard the VLS wind up call to him - very good indeed, very funny.

(After calling VLS a twat in a previous thread I feel a little hypocritical but hell - but it's still funny when a massive twat winds up a slightly larger twat)

I always read Sewell's art column in the Standard. He may be a fool, but he's the best writer working at that disgraceful, monopolistic, pleb-baiting rag. The world would be a poorer place without him.

And he's the last man on the face of the planet using Received Pronunciation. He's posher than the Queen.

A great unintended comedy moment was on "Today" on R4, one morning last week.

Architect Richard Rogers was being interviewed over the phone about his sacking by the Welsh Assembly. He spluttered furiously about his treatment.... whilst in the background a cockatoo or parrot or something squawked gleefully every few seconds. I laughed and laughed.

Kes.

A film that makes me laugh every time I watch. Some intentionally humorous scenes but others unintentionaly hilarious. For example - the working men's club, the farmer, the library, the bloke in the street, I could go on...

But won't.

Attachments. Funniest thing on telly for years.

Keanu Reeves trying to look butch in 'Speed' - I pissed myself laughing at the cinema.

Nick Cotton. They might as well have given him a moustache and top hat and allowed him to tie Mark Fowler to a railway track.

>Kes.
>
>A film that makes me laugh every time I watch. Some intentionally humorous scenes but others unintentionaly hilarious. For example - the working men's club, the farmer, the library, the bloke in the street, I could go on...
>
>But won't.

Is it just me or do all the men in the working men's club in Kes look like Bill Oddie circa 1964?

Well it was filmed in 1969. Maybe Bill was 5 years ahead of his time.

But then, it was a Barnsley WMC, so maybe more like 10 years behind.

Top Gun.

so many things. my favourite was the noise when Goose banged his head on the cockpit. and tom cruise shouting out "Goose!".

don't know, it just struck a chord.

The Tate Modern

>The Tate Modern

Easy!

Wrong century, but...

The ridiculous scene on the aeroplane in Jurassic Park 3 when Alan Grant momentarily hallucinates a velociraptor speaking his name.

that film "Magnolia" made me giggle. Best bits: Julianne Moore's "this is my Oscar scene baby" when she cries in a chemist shop. you could see her bite marks in the walls of the place.

But the bit where i had to stuff handkerchiefs in my mouth to stop my laughter ruining it for others was when all the cast started singing the same song. it was excruciating.

and those frogs...

There was an 'Animal 999' being shown too loud in a pub, which I recall showed a horse suspended above a moat, and a group of three vigilante monkeys running amok through some town in Mexico. Honestly. It made me laugh an awful lot, though.

Pushing Tin

A universally critically acclaimed movie from an incredible acting / writing / production team that falls foul of every single Steven Seagal men-in-competition cliche going. They wrestle in a river for christ's sake. Everything short of Billy Bob Thornton being reflected in John Cusack's aviator shades. Laughably poor in every single sense. Much funnier than High Fidelity for a start, Cusack fans.



(And that's the second Magnolia slag off I've heard this week. Was I wrong to like it? Shall I change my mind...? Oh, so much confusion...)

See what Mike and Joe say, that's your best bet. Or bent halo at a push.
NOT Toast Rack though.

Sorry that's possibly confusing. My message is in reply too:
(And that's the second Magnolia slag off I've heard this week. Was I wrong to like it? Shall I change my mind...? Oh, so much confusion...)

Now you're just confusing me more...

Aunty Em! Aunty Em!

I was at a summer film school in 1994, not long after Derek Jarman snuffed it, and Blue was one of the films shown. When one of the disembodied voices declared, "I am a queer-loving, cock-sucking LESBIAN MAN!!", it was a real effort to suppress a giggle, surrounded by all these right-on people in the audience: then, when a chorus of voices started singing that line, I was lucky I didn't explode from suppressed hysterical laughing.

An unintended comedy moment (but also shot through with a kind of pathos) was Jim Broadbent's interview with Andrew Duncan (I think) in the Radio Times when he was on the PR bandwagon for The Peter Principle, in which JB said that this role would be the making of him (this was after he worked with Woody Allen, who let's face it, only works with nobodies), and insisted on talking up the role he was playing as if it were King Lear rather than a one-dimensional pratfalling oaf in a shabby little end-of-the-pier farce.

(David Bamber was the same when he discussed his role in Chalk, as was Robert Daws talking about Office Gossip. Damn these talented actors and their insecurities.)