Couldn't give a monkey's.

Ah! But how do we know that's not a hoax.

Some people clearly live in a dream world!

The makers of the Brass Eye Special are actively encouraging publicity for the programme, revealing details about the true content a fortnight or so in advance, through Chris Morris's record label and the NME "news story" (which was clearly just a write up of some materials they'd been sent by Talkback.)

Far be it from me to suggest that Mr Congena really wants to feel involved and so has invented a role for himself...

Sorry Mr Congena, I've just worked out that you're only passing on the "news." Okay so I'm slagging off the nice bloke from that good website. Whoops. But I can't stop it being true.

your explanation does sound the more convincing, but who knows? don't shoot the messenger, etc. etc.

I am Roger Crowley, and it was me who posted up every single hoax - even this one here, that I am writing now, this is a hoax, too! Of course, it's all fallen a bit flat now, as I have stretched everyone's patience beyond breaking point.

But...

Imagine if I had succeeded! Oh, what evil I would have caused! Ha ha ha ha haaaa!

>don't shoot the messenger, etc. etc.

Yes, sorry about that. Not sure what I was thinking there - probably "yet another loony running a website" or something like that.

Oooh Jurassic Park's on!

Smashing. Great. Let's not talk about it until next Thurs, eh?

I could get my cock out while we're waiting?

>I could get my cock out while we're waiting?

You mean it isn't already?

No, let's shoot the messenger. That'll fucking teach him.

When Neil runs out of messengers, nobody'll be able to hear his self-important, know-nothing whining.

>>I could get my cock out while we're waiting?
>
>You mean it isn't already?

That's my face, cheeky.

>No, let's shoot the messenger. That'll fucking teach him.
>
>When Neil runs out of messengers, nobody'll be able to hear his self-important, know-nothing whining.

Oh come now. There's no need to be that... er... honest.

Is it me or is cookd and bomd down at the moment? Again?

> When Neil runs out of messengers, nobody'll be able to hear his self-important, know-nothing whining.

Still not got yourself a name yet? Do the DSS know about this?

That's reminded me of that Half Man Half Biscuit article today. That's education.

Mmmmtired.

Yeah, while everyone else seems to be trying on cool, I salute you and you're hoaxing talents.
I personally don't feel at all indifferent to the showing/non-showing of the programme.
I desperately want to see it, and if you've helped at all in this then more power to your parts.

Notwithstanding the fact that it was a paste from the front of CaB, still my point stands.
I thought it was from the CaB guy, stupid me.

>Yeah, while everyone else seems to be trying on cool, I salute you and you're hoaxing talents. I personally don't feel at all indifferent to the showing/non-showing of the programme.

Can we just clear this up? All this "trying to be cool" gibberish is missing the point. Of course I care about the programme, and desperately want to see it. But the constant attempts to hoax and counter-hoax, the endless conspiracy theories and backbiting (what is this, the Tory leadership contest?) were, indeed still are, becoming a nightmare, draining any joy out of the forthcoming show.

I'm not altogether sure how much use the CaB hoax was in 'protecting' the show. It muddied the bathwater so much we can barely see the baby any more. And it appears increasingly plausible that the 'leaking' of the show's contents is studied and deliberate, even though at first I considered it to be a huge cock-up on the part of the NME. Oh, even if it isn't, the hoax didn't help any. It just soured an already potent debate cocktail. (Memo to me: no more fucking metaphors.)

I stand by what I said. Chris Morris has made me laugh for years, and I trust him to deliver a show that he is happy with. I am very excited about it. I will be hunched over the video ready to record it twenty-four hours in advance. But it's all the unnecessary bollocks surrounding it that I don't care about.

I'm eagerly awaiting the main event. I'm just not interested in all the juggling and fire-eating that's going on at the fringes. (Damn - metaphors again.)

>I'm eagerly awaiting the main event. I'm just not interested in all the juggling and fire-eating that's going on at the fringes.

Bad metaphor that. Because you'll see a lot of fire eating and juggling in the main ring too...oh hang on...

>It just soured an already potent debate cocktail.

Exactly. The bitterness of a disappointed lemon. A paper umbrella of tacky over-involvement, long since gone soggy, providing no protection whatsoever to the glace cherry from the saliva flecks of my fat mother.

You gone peculiar again?

Do you mind if I stand, sir? I think perhaps this 'sitting down' idea of yours was a little ahead of its time.

sorry but i think that considering neil is responsible for one of the best websites on the internet we should give him the benefit of the doubt as to what his motives were for the hoax. i dont know obviously, i have never met or spoke to him but to all the people who have insinuated he is doing it for his own self-importance, just take a look on your hard drives and cd-rs and see how much rare and fantastic stuff you have from his site. im sure a huge amount of hard work went into it and, by all accounts, he has had a massive amount of grief over the last month, promting him to possibly close the site.

why dont all the blame-pointers and people judging him by their own standards just keep their opinions to themselves and everyone else be grateful that someone put the effort in to get these things into the public domain.

im sorry if i neglected to mention other people who were in some way responsible for the site also (i know TJ was and some others whos names escape me) and also if this message sounds like a big suck of neils naughty pipe but i think he is being hard done by.

I agree that Neil has had a disproportionate amount of grief over this. I also think he acted with the best of intentions. But I'm not sure it was helpful, and as I (among others) was accused of trying to be aloof from the whole thing and not giving a bugger I just thought I'd clarify.

Having read *everything* BES related on this board, I still reckon aloofness was the paradigm.
It's neither a good or bad thing, but I suspect that CaB was done an injustice in retrospect, and to deny such is a bit suspect.
CaB obviously acted with the best of intentions, and it appears very few are willing to accept this.

>Nice glory-hunting there, Rich.

(...coming from Neil)

that was a different rich. there are many in the world you know