that depends whether you've put in an order for those night vision goggles, extra soft soled shoes from the mail order stalker's monthly :O)

I expect you're ok though.

bees in the what now?

half past three...

Buffalo are just cows with big heads.

Cheese and onion, pet.

Do they have bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at me?

>Buffalo are just cows with big heads.

I still have the photo that suzi took...

:O)

I enjoyed the mossy imagery.

I'm a mossy statue.

And yes, I am some kind of an anthem, thankyou for noticing. If that wasn't what you mean, i have no idea what you're talking about.

I look like a teenage anthem.
I look like a magazine girl.
I look like I could have been happy in another world...
[with apologies to Everclear]

THATS just the type of attitude i want.... for my egroup.

My e-mail is free of egroups.

So, back to these people what love me. Er. All none of you.

want some turnip??

>want some turnip??

Are you after subbes???

i'm greeene, if thats what you meeene.


grabbin mic.

A0d's been turned down enough ot know that I don't really find Morrisian-style insanity alluring.

I have enough insanity in my own head without hooking up with someone who likes writing it on messageboards.

>My e-mail is free of egroups.
>
>So, back to these people what love me. Er. All none of you.



Aww! I do.

Will you marry me?

Or at the very least, hide me under your bed?

pssst.. subbes likes to collect jellybeans.


she used to like M+M's, but shes decided they're a bit too 'commercial' for her.

you can hide under my bead.

but you'll have to share the space with a small mexican family that has taken up residence there.

I've started the revolution.

all the cool people sleep on beads now.

beds are sooo 20th century.

yeah next century will be better.........................
roll on 2001

Speaking as a geek, I can safely say that the Millennium Bug is behind us and therefore we are already in the new millennium.

If any software goes wrong this New Year, it is just down to routine incompetence.

It always is....

I'ts all my fault.

Really.

yeah yeah yadda yadda the new millenium doesn't begin till 2001 and all that..

you try telling that to 5 billion people intent on a party :O)

it just means we can have two.

and any software glitches are uncle bill's fault.

it was all going so well untill he thieved the mac os and made it worse, then sold it to 90% of the population of the world :O) *

*just kidding bill, put those high priced greasy lawyers back in the box..

>Will you marry me?
>
>Or at the very least, hide me under your bed?

Of course. And hide there myself, as well.

Are you sure there's room?

I'd make room anywhere for you - especially in my pointless, self-obsessed little life.

You can fit me in a shoebox if you try hard enough.

No, harder. Harder!


HARDER!

um...

*looks a bit sheepish*

no, I won't make some comment about being as hard as you like. I respect your finer feelings, and am not a frustrated little perv.

You walked into that one.

careful Jake, you could trip someone over if you're not careful...

Yeah, put the rollerskates away.

@

riverswimm = trees worth of hatred.

subbes......could you ever love someone with a big nose?

Depends... how big is the nose? melsketeer had a HUGE nose and we all know what happened to me over _him_...

I don't know about anyone called melsketeer, to be honest. All I know is I adore you, and care about you, and now what it's like, feeling somehow isolated from these strange, frightening things called people. Honeztly. I don't care if you tell me I'm wrong.

LOL - why do i get the feeling (zippy) this is not a joke??

oyg oyg oyg jeffrey jeffery~Llama.. pomf.

(-yoo vish tri-gyall-)

satillite kite kyiteem boo

>I don't know about anyone called melsketeer, to be honest.

Then you're quite clearly not a proper ex cakeshopper. Tchah.


> All I know is I adore you, and care about you, and

They sell valium at the door, you know.

> [I k]now what it's like, feeling somehow isolated from these strange, frightening things called people.

That's all right, I'm not human. Perfectly normal.

I didn't mean that you weren't human, honestly. If you want me to leave you alone I will, but I honestly never meant to annoy or irritate you in any way.

>I didn't mean that you weren't human, honestly.

But I did. I'm a giant rabbit that types. Wooooargh!

Or something, anyway.


> If you want me to leave you alone I will, but I honestly never meant to annoy or irritate you in any way.

Go on, do that "Guvna" bit.

Oh all right, then...you've been warned...

"You're off the case, George! You're emotionally involved."

-- "But Guv...."


"The Fifth Floor won't be happy about this, Jack - you've broken every rule in the book."

-- "You seem to have FORGOTTEN that I nicked a VILLAIN, Guv!"



"Look sunshine! You may be Special Branch but that doesn't make yer GOD ALMIGHTY! I'm a D.I., and you're a sergeant - if you've got a conplaint to make, you go through your Guvnor. GOT IT!? Now sod off!"


"Guvnor! Dog and bone - urgent."

You're an angel. Thanks.

*flutters eyelashes, bit difficult to do in words only but never mind*

No trouble at all, mon petit ange.

>*flutters eyelashes, bit difficult to do in words only but never mind*

Also, it's not something you tend to see men doing all the time. Yours appear to have become wedged shut.


>No trouble at all, mon petit ange.

Mais oui.

Ou est la gare s'li vous plait?

Quel heure est il?

my GCSE french is ropey at best..

In France, that great 60's series Man In A Suitcase was known, apparently, as Homme Dans Un Valise.

oh dear...will subbes go off me now, seeing that I'm enough of a geek to know things like that?

heh, I doubt it.

I expect it's endearing.

You think, Joe?
Well, what a pity you're not me, eh? I'm sure you could play the part so much better, and everything...


No, Jake, it's just mildly quirky. Best you take the dress off, though.

*snaps fingers*

Drat and double drat! Knew I'd overlooked something, in trying to become rich and famous very easily via the Izzard plan - wearing a dress and speaking ersatz French was simple enough, unfortunately I can't speak in a middle-class accent, and I don't look like a midget Yeti who's had a shave...

...I'd still adore you, subbes, whatever you thought of me.

I doubt I could.

life is based on assumptions is it not?...

never mind, forget it.

so, cats drilling...

Tell me to go away if I'm being nosey, subbes, but is it true that you used to live in Oxford? I remember reading it on your site, it's only that I've just moved (full-time) to Cowley myself.

I, erm, yes, but no, not any more.

Look, it's the goodyear blimp! http://ds.dial.pipex.com/ap2/

I know you're in the States now, I honestly didn't mean to pry. Cowley is getting more and more yuppified and expensive, you'll be unsurprised to hear.

I expected that to happen. I'm just glad I didn't live in oxford, just near enough to it that I didn't have a Swindon postcode.




No, hang on, I _did_ have a Swindon postcode. Erm.