Bugger
If you can't say something good about someone - they must be a right rotten bastard.
The meek shall inherit the earth - after the capitalists have stripped it of its ores and gutted it.
What about the Meek? They've got a bloody cheek. [Mark E.Smith]
Shifty bunch the meek Jon. They're just waiting to take it all.
The landscape is destroyed and the dream of it is everywhere.
[Iain Sinclair]
Oh hang on, that's an interesting quotation, rather than a proverb... ignore it, alas.
"It's all bollocks, isn't it?"
-- Richie Richard, 'Bottom'
if at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
Too many cocks soil the brothel.
Look before you leak.
A hand on the bird is worth two in the bush.
Technology's wank.
(A man in the pub last night who refused to allow us to split the bill between us, insisting one person had to pay because that was the way the computerised till worked... when pressed on the matter he gave the rather broad generalisation quoted above- I await Bill Gates response)
A stitch in time saves blood loss and helps reduce the possibility of serious scarring.
"If you can't say anything nice then do you wanna write for our website?" - The Corpses
a bird in the hand makes a mess on your wrist.
people in glass houses should have sex in the basement.
One in the bush is worth two in the hand (sexual reference).
Absence makes stuff.
Proverbs are a load of old anus anyway.
I have it on good authority that Charlie Watts can be found on the heath most Sunday afternoons, adding to his ever growing collection of moss.
He that spareth his rod hateth his son - yet he that hath giveth unto his son's arse a right bashing is locked up.
As a dog returneth to his vomit, so will the abusive drunk receive gob in his Indian.
It has been said (this is not a proverb) that I am a nasty foul person. But let me quote Bertrand Russell:
Three passions, simple but overwhelmingly strong, have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind.
Oh, and I also get a kick out of taking the piss.
>Some modern forum proverbs........
If you can't arse-kiss our show, then don't post any comments.
Ignorance of criticism is bliss.
To err is human,
To really foul things up requires a C4 scheduler.
When you Look East you will see the rising sun and nothing else.
Shit happens - to plebs.
Those who can criticise, those who can't make programmes.
One review fits all shows.
>>> and my favourite:
Go forth, and post messages.
If a tree falls in the forest and there is no-one there, it greatly reduces the risk of injury.
if a tree falls in the forest on a mime, does anyone care?
>if a tree falls in the forest on a mime, does anyone care?
Aha! Someone knows their Gary Larson.
"Little Bear! A watched head never gets eaten by ants."
If a mime swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
The meek shall inherit the earth. The morons will inherit the media.
The pen may be mightier than the sword, but a shotgun is more effective.
When a farmer shoots someone it's reasonable force, when a policeman shoots someone it's murder.
You can show a performer a critique, but you can't make them read it.
He who laughs last is one comedy fad behind.
Let sleeping dogs lie - or get a divorce.
Where there's clips, there's shows.
Think before you drink - you could become leader of the Tories.
The Script Editors motto:
It only takes a minute, to bag it, and bin it.
Keep Britain Tidy - dump your litter abroad.
A bird in the hand can mean thrush in the bush.
Use humour to stand up to bullies - then get your head kicked in.
The boss dictates the letter.
The secretary types the letter.
The clerk gets all the crap caused because of the letter.
Never judge a book by its cover - or by the Booker Prize.
The streets of Heaven are pathed with gold - it takes a brave man to bend down in front of a gay club.