How about these examples from 'Carry On Being Politically Incorrect':

'I say, missus, I would like to have sexual intercourse with you'

'Your pert breasts give me an erection, which I shall demonstrate by moving this phallic object in an upward direction.'

'Ooh, matron, Barbara Windsor's got her tits out again'

If anyone thinks of any more non-double entendres, could they please give me one. Ta.

>I've invented the SINGLE ENTENDRE.

Now c'mon be honest did you *really* invent it? This means that John Thompson stole your ideas for his politically correct working man's club type comedian all those years ago...shame on him!

Personally, I think the single entendre works better when it follows and hence demolishes a single entendre....as in Lee and Herring's classic:

"I wouldn't mind getting my hands on his extra pinta if you know what I mean. I mean his cock."

Me and a friend used to love shouting out such single entendres while listening to the News Huddlines:

ROY HUDD: I was airing my grievances in the park yesterday...

US: And then I exposed by genitals!

ROY HUDD: I always use starch on my smalls...

US: My small penis and testicles of course.

Not the Nine O'Clock News did something a bit like this when they parodied the Two Ronnies in the sketch "The Two Ninnies".

Ah yes...

"Throughout the show we will be implying that I have a very small part..."
"And I have a enourmous penis."

Love that song too: "J Arthur Rank, and a willy, arse, goolie..."

And there was that other sketch about swearing entering our tickle-my-nuts language: "And what evidence do you have for this strange breast-fondling theory, reverend?"
"Well, you just have to listen. Do you realise you just said 'breast-fondling', large nipple?"
"I did not!"
"Yes, yank on it, you did! That's my whole big thing point. People are uttering obsenities take me, take me, without even knowing it."

Don't write comedy like that anymore, do they?

"I love to watch the sun go down,
over China, over China, over China Town."

Kinda Lingers....

Not a reference to memories of a Peter Davison Dr Who story, but the final song featured in Not the Nine O'Clock News.

"Kinda lingers, Pam?"