It's spelt "St John" not "Singeon" you wittering fool

'Crime Traveller'. Boy. Now that *was* a bad programme.

>It's spelt "St John" not "Singeon" you wittering fool

Not when it the man's name.
That's like saying, it's spelt Ian not Iain or something. Fool

Its spelt sea-sore, you idiot.
Only a playground thing is a seesaw.

Q: And now on the Today Programme, Sir Norman SAINT JOHN Stevas.
A: Actually that's pronounced "Sinjen".
Q: Oh, I'm sorry. Sir SINJEN Saint John Stevas.

No, it never really happened, but it would have been dead funny if it had.

There was a kid at my primary school whose middle name was 'St John'. His first name was already 'Earl', so when that came out everyone laughed at him. That drove him off the rails, he became an evil, violent bully, got expelled from a couple of schools, and now has a life of unemployment punctuated by petty crime.

The above story is true.

Oh hang on, he was an evil little bastard before we heard about his name, that was just a bit of light relief amongst the general misery of going to the same school as him.

Apart from that detail, the story is still true, though admittedly now less remarkable.

Its a turn-up for the book when the school bully is called Earl St John Fortesque (fair enough, I'm guessing the surname). Our school bully was called Oggy Baldwin.

It was not Fortescue, and his family were not well-off at all.

My school bully was called Robert something, which only goes to show that bullying breaks down class barriers. And your victim's spirit.

Seriously, bullying is a form of torture that's either ignored or tacitly sanctioned by schoolteachers. I just wish someone would do something about it, I just don't know what.......

Cattle prods?

>Cattle prods?

That would be offensive to dumb animals!

I was once in a chemistry class, when the resident 'bully', started harrassing someone. The teacher flipped, and shouted "get out, if you don't want to learn , you can go off and be a brick layer...actually no, on second thoughts, brick laying is a skilled art, too good for you.." This made me laugh for ages just thinking about it. So, it goes to show, not all teachers are ridiculous creatures.

But did the bully just pick up a jar of acid, throw it over the teacher, and laugh as he dissolved?

That would have been a great bit of physical comedy, better than the teacher's rather over-loaded non-pithy one-liner.

No, but the same chemistry teacher did set fire to his foot trying to stamp out meths.
(on the floor, not in general)

Our school bully once got his dick out in a Chemistry lesson (while the teacher wasn't present) , turned his chair towards the rest of the class and started idly wanking it to a hard-on, making the girls squeal and the boys laugh. I noted that, even though he was the tallest in the class, my own dick was actually much bigger than his.

From that day on, I no longer feared the school bully.