>Do channel 4 know what they're doing? Thanks to such close ups of Peters I was coerced into staying up for 'Erotika'.
It's 'Eurotika'.
Err...no that I watch it or...
(note to self: stop digging)
I'm beginning to suspect that "kinder surprise" is an elaborately constructed front for this "Russell" fellow's PR team.
>I'm beginning to suspect that "kinder surprise" is an elaborately constructed front for this "Russell" fellow's PR team.
Oh yes! I've been rumbled. I was given the painfully bottom of the pit job title of 'SOTCAA PR representative'.
Come on Dr.H I'm beginning to suspect all this suspicion of yours is an elaborately constructed denial of the arousal you also feel for the gorgeous Mr.Peters.
Well, the only way to find out for sure is for me to measure my blood-pressure and ECG while looking at a naked GIF of this "Mr. Peters". Of course, I'll need a control one of you. Mail me the GIFs and I'll tell you the results.
>Well, the only way to find out for sure is for me to measure my blood-pressure and ECG while looking at a naked GIF of this "Mr. Peters". Of course, I'll need a control one of you. Mail me the GIFs and I'll tell you the results.
A control one of me? LOL. Like an amphetamine to bring you down?
No, I mean so that I can compare the effects the two GIFs have on me. Otherwise the results are meaningless.
Come along now, do it for the good of science.
kinder, why not send him your picture of subbes? That would be more effective as a control item.
Jon, leave subbes alone and go and drink your shandy like a good little shandy-drinker.
I'm still convinced you like your shandy.
All Southerners drink shandy.
We Northerners know that for a fact.
Shut up, you're putting me off my Jif.
Drink a bottle a day, and you never need buy a toothbrush.
Course, the ulcers get you down a bit. But us southerners can take it. You 2 would be running off to the doctors, skiving off work, etc.
>us southerners can take it.
No you can't, you're a shandy drinker.
Just admit it Jon. It's historical fact.
Skiving off work?
I haven't had a day out of this here pit in 12 years!
Ooh, and hark it 'im! Cleaning your teeth indeed! We're not on the continent you know!
Ailie, you are clearly projecting your insecurities onto others... shandy girl.
That is preposterous.
There is one VERY obvious shandy-drinker in this forum (IT IS JON) and we are all now aware of who it is, thanks to my clever and subtle pointing-out of the matter...
I think you've proved my point for me, thankyou very much.
Any one fancy a pint?
Bring me some surgical spirit, for I will drink no shandy!
Jon, do you like the taste of it or something?
How could you?
It's such light-weight piss-water.
Dr.H I have erected a Russell Peters website.
It's very clever, it's written from the perspective of a young girl who is quite obviously hormonally smitten on Mr.Peters. I found this style of writing very easy.
Would you like to visit it? It has many images on him on it. And you could use a shandy as a control item.
kinder, I saw him on EoB last night. Believe me, I could hardly have been less aroused. Also, did I miss it or did they not actually show him on stage? Maybe he just specialises in talking to camera-crews and appearing on posters. Is his act the same standard as the rest of the rubbish they have on this show?
I mean, it's really depressing. Although the Corpses have an irrational dislike of Adam Bloom, he is recognisably a stand-up. I mean, he actually tells jokes that use language to subvert your expectations and thus create a humourous reaction. But the current crop:
Aussie bloke: "Woo-hoo! Fucking fucking Edinburgh fucking Pommy wankers!" [huge audience cheer]
Aussie bint: "I took myself into Debenhams this afternoon. Whoops, fashion alert! (pulls surprised face]. Then I went to Woolies [pulls surprised face]. Then I took it up the arse! [pulls surprised face]"
The 2 with the TVs looked like a good idea, but they didn't show anything very funny.
Talk about lowered expectations.
Someone who's at the Fringe please tell me - these Gilded Balloon-sponsored acts aren't representative, are they?
Oh yeah kinder, stop being nasty to subbes. Her site is probably a lot better than your Peters-oriented creamfest.
I'm not being nasty to her. I just like to push boundaries. I eagerly await a genuinely wonderful retort from her. That's all I'm after. She's a great cream-less writer after all.
Incidentally, they did show snippets of Russell on stage. You were most likely blinded by the beauty. And I do agree that the other comedians are a little wanting. But let's face it the programme is scheduled as a warm up for 'Frontal'.
It was one of the most depressing programmes I have ever seen in my life.
>I'm not being nasty to her. I just like to push boundaries. I eagerly await a genuinely wonderful retort from her. That's all I'm after. She's a great cream-less writer after all.
Most people grew out of that sort of thing when they left secondary school. Or is it a side effect of the very same drugs that make you 'adore' this Peters (who has the looks of a frog in a blender) that you forget how to act like anything other than a hormone-controlled bitch?
Mr.Biggles I would take your thoughtful advice but you ruined it all by comparing the untouchable looks of Mr.Peters with 'a frod in a blender'. It certainly doesn't say a lot for YOUR hormonal urges if you see frog carnage as something sexually arousing. I thought people grew out of that mindset after secondary school...
And I love subbes. Disguising that love is what life's all about.
P.S Dr if you'd like to see my homage to Russell it's here:
http://www.stas.net/6/russell
It's not a patch on subbes' site and the design is very rudimentary but it has some nice pictures of him.
"It was one of the most depressing programmes I have ever seen in my life."
Justin, next Sunday try to get up to watch te teenagers-debate-social-issues show on Channel 5. I saw it yesterday and lost all faith in the future of democracy.
Fan fucking tastic!
Kinder, the site is wicked! :0)
I think we should lower the voting age to 16 because it is a good idea and would be good.
>Fan fucking tastic!
>
>Kinder, the site is wicked! :0)
>
Why thanks Ailie. I was aiming for something as smooth and truthful as your Mark Lamarr offering. :)
Oh, you sarcastic little imp!
R.P. = One pug dude.
Uglier that a pile up on the M25.
>
>R.P. = One pug dude.
>Uglier that a pile up on the M25.
Whatthefuck?!
Is that some kind of code?
Never mind, I get it now.
Beautifully worded...
Don't listen Ailie. He's obviously someone whose only dealings with sex happen during motorway drowsiness.
Has Russell seen your website yet?
I was toying with the idea of calling the Assembly Rooms and demanding to speak to him so that I could pass on the URL...
It really is an html-based marvel!
LOL! Why thankyou Ailie. But I would fear for the policing that would be enforced during any future visits you have planned for the Assembly Rooms over any desire to increase the hits to my site.
Has Mr.Lamarr visited your HTML sensation?
>Has Mr.Lamarr visited your HTML sensation?
HA! He is (to be politically correct and kind) technologically disadvantaged...
I know that he's seen bits and pieces printed out, but I don't know if he's seen it on-line yet in all it's glory! :0)
Have you considered constructing a tribute site for Keith Allen's cock?
>Have you considered constructing a tribute site for Keith Allen's cock?
>
It's pleasing to know I'm in such demand as a webmaster. But Keith's cock is a constructed tribute in itself. I don't think I could top it.
Yes, yes, but I was thinking more of exposing it's wonder to the world...
"But Keith's cock is a constructed tribute in itself. I don't think I could top it."
I thought lots of women had been on top of it...
>"But Keith's cock is a constructed tribute in itself. I don't think I could top it."
>
>I thought lots of women had been on top of it...
Jon that's like suggesting many people climb mount. Everest.
WHICH Australians are representing our fine continent on EorB?? Uh oh.
I think I need a shandy.
Jon? Fancy a pint?
Janet, does the phrase "Australian comedy duo" strike as much terror into you as it does me?
so you HAVE been reading TimeOut for prospective entertainment.
Who's the Australian Comedy duo then?
Julia Morris is being followed by Ed or Bust and is very much an Aussie. And I think she's very good, as well as lovely.
It's not just Supergirly. I have memories of finding the Doug Anthony Allstars quite dismal, years ago. Mind you, there was more than 2 of them, which just shows how rubbish they were.
The Dougs were damned unsuccessful as a duo - we kept saying to them "It's a matter of basic arithmetic boys" but did they listen, oh no...
Hey, two Perrier winners were Aussie duos - Los Trios Ringbarkus and Lano and Woodley. I reckon we do comedy duos damned well (Supergirly actually started in London, so nyah, they're yours Jon).
We also have Scared Weird Little Guys - always popular at the Spiegeltent at previous Fringes. And for your duo + 1 you can't go past the dynamic Tripod.
Absolutely excellent live act.
www.3pod.com
I blanch at the thought of British duos, because it makes me think of Hale and Pace.
Janet thankyou for your kind words in my Guestbook. You sound like woman who really knows her stuff!
I'm there for you kiddo!
Janet, may I say I think you are most charming.
Aw shucks, you've made me blush. Ta kinder s.
>And I love subbes. Disguising that love is what life's all about.
I'll meet you behind the bike sheds at 5 pm, Kinder. Wear that sexy blazer.
I've missed you subbes.
Yeah, but only because that pistol has such a short range.
>Yeah, but only because that pistol has such a short range.
How did you know my pistol had brought out a fashion collection of summer-wear?
Its owner certainly has a "quick-fire" wit, hah ha ha... oh, sod you all....
Arf arf!
I thought it was a bit of a damp sqib, myself.
But never mind, I'm sure she'll find some sparkle...
subbesy the sparkle of your presence will suffice. You could turn a damp suib into a promiscuous opportunity you're so special.
Yes. i have pornstar boots, too.
# kinky boots, kinky boots #
# kinky boots, kinky boots #
Actually, yes.
i knew it!
did you used to be my deputy headmistress?