'Insect Nation' by Bill Bailey

"Poisoning Pigeons In The Park" - Tom Lehrer

"Love Song" - Sam Kinison

"24 Hours In Tunbridge Wells" - Rutland Weekend Television

"Ronnie Hazlehurst's Requiem" - Spitting Image

"Posing In The Moonlight" - The HeeBeeGeeBees

Honourable mention: "Protest Song" - Neil Innes


Actually, although it's a low-grade rendition, I'd nominate the unsettling "Rudyard Kipling" from the unreleased Python album on this very site to appear somewhere on that list - or at least in a top 20...

Eric the Half a Bee - Monty Python
In Old Mexico - Tom Lehrer
Yes We Have No Bananas - Spike Jones
Fuckin' Ell It's Fred Titmus - Half Man Half Biscuit
Polka Your Eyes Out - Weird Al Yankovic
Frank Sinatra Sings Working Class Cliches - Victor Lewis Smith
Baronet Oswald Ernold Moseley - Not the Nine O'Clock News

Trumpton Riots - HMHB
Reflections In A Flat - HMHB
Transmission - Joy Division
Trucking - NTNON

'Shirt' by the Bonzos, esp. the proto-Morris beginning.

Or possibly 'Tent'

(sung in a hoarse rock'n'roll voice)

"My love is so inscrutable,
In a stoic sort of way"

'Bastards' by Victoria Wood:

Whenever they say 'Did you enjoy the show?'
I'll say I did not like it, it was crap
I was really, really bored
It should win a Fringe award
They had to wake me up to make me clap

'War Goes Bang' - Chris Morris
'Right, I Said' - Victor Lewis-Smith
'Charles Aznovoice' - The Goodies
'I'm So Worried' - Monty Python

Eat Meat, Whale Meat - Chris Morris

Bob Dylan: "Bob Dylan's Dream"
Neil Young: "Welfare Mothers"
The Kinks: "Lola"
White Noise: "Here Come The Fleas"
Frank Zappa: "Flakes"

'My Mum Song' by Derek & Clive

"Cheese and Onion" - The Rutles
"All I Want for Christmas..." - HMHB
"America", "Mystery" - Hugh Laurie
"Sit on my face" - Python
"Knights of the Round Table" - Python

Agree with most of the above too, esp. HMHB & "Trucking".

Oh, and "The Asshole Song", Dennis Leary. Not fashionable, I know, but I thought it was funny.

>Oh, and "The Asshole Song", Dennis Leary. Not fashionable, I know, but I thought it was funny.

Yes - I was going to mention this but I was a big coward. His Irish Drinking Song is pretty good too.

Most of the stuff mentioned above, plus:

Kill! -- Alberto Y Lost Trios Paranoias
Lying On The Sofa -- Notsensibles
Everybody Sings Queen -- frank sidebottom
Do The Albert -- Scaffold
Two Little Boys (cover version by Splodgenessabounds)
Assorted bits of Phil Popery from 'Radio Active', incl the House Marvins, Human Leek, Hymen & Carbuncle, Ches'n'Des, Kate Bosh, etc

and of course "Why Do People Always Clap At The End Of A Comedy Song?" from 'A Look Back At The Nineties', executed by Hugh Dennis in finest Stilgoe.

milky milky

Uzi like a metal dick in my hand
Magazine like a big testicle gland

Happy Birthday - The Smiths
Unlovable - The Smiths
Girlfriend in a Coma - The Smiths
Half a person - The Smiths
Sweet and Tender Hooligan - The Smiths

Morrissey was, in fact, a comedian,
but not many saw the point.

>Morrissey was, in fact, a comedian,
>but not many saw the point.

He was certainly a bit of a joke.
<wah wah>

>
>>Morrissey was, in fact, a comedian,
>>but not many saw the point.
>
>He was certainly a bit of a joke.
><wah wah>
>
>
That's funny, that. You should be on the radio with that sort of stuff.

>Happy Birthday - The Smiths

Do you mean Unhappy Birthday, off Strangeways Here We Come?

Not strictly comedy songs, but they make me laugh, so...

"Uncle Walter" by Ben Folds Five ("What a perfect world this world would be/If he were president/[Screams] But he's NOT!!!"

"Every Little Counts" by New Order (for Bernard Sumner's corpsing in the first verse)

"There Ain't Half Been Some Clever Bastards" by Ian Dury & The Blockheads (rude, charming, and the bit about Segovia is just brilliant)

"Jilted John" - very childish and stupid, but I love it

"I Spy" by Pulp - probably not supposed to be funny, but makes me giggle nervously

"911 Is A Joke" by Duran Duran (hilarious, but they probably didn't intend it that way)

"Who Do You Worship?" by De La Soul (off the "De La Soul Is Dead" album, this two-minute rap/metal vignette has some side-splitting words as well)

The intro of "Public Image" by Public Image Limited, simply because the barrage of "hello"s sounds uncannily like a multi-tracking of one of my work colleagues

"Roy's Keen" by Morrissey (only because he rhymes "you won't find a keener/Window ca-leener". It is otherwise shite.)

"What I Like Most About You Is Your Girlfriend" by The Special AKA (rightly remembered for their perceptive political pop songs, they occasionally unleashed a very funny ditty. This is one - not a hit, sadly)

Jilted John.
"My Name Is" - by Eminem. You've gotta admit, it's funny. "My brain's dead weight/I'm trying to get my head straight/But I can't figure out what what Spice Girl I wanna impregnate."
"When A Felon's" Gilbert & Sullivan.

>>Happy Birthday - The Smiths
>
>Do you mean Unhappy Birthday, off Strangeways Here We Come?
>
> Indeed I do

My thanks go out, by the way, to whoever pointed out somewhere on this forum that the Jilted John album had finally been re-issued on CD. In any sensible universe, this record would have been a pile of shameless cash-in rubbish. It isn't, though. It's fantastic. Everybody go and buy it.

'Oo You Lookin At?' Alexei Sayle
'Insect Nation' Bill Bailey
'Birdman of Wormwood Scrubbs' Boothby Graffoe
'Unlucky In Love' Clam Abuse
'Funk You' DAAS
'Kickin' Ass' Hugh Laurie
'Dan's Underpants' The Macc Lads (well it made me laugh)

>I Agree with several of the other choices and would add:

'Happy Happy Joy Joy Song' from Ren and Stimpy
'My Lovely Horse' from Father Ted (Jack's right, the lyrics are fine....)

(name removed) and (name removed) write this website.

(name removed) and (name removed) write this website.

'Jumble Sale' by Jake Thackray.

'The Castleford Ladies Magical Circle' by Jake Thackray.

'Lah Di Dah' by Jake Thackray.

'Personals' by Steps.

(Oh alright, by Jake Thackray)

(for Kipster)

Lorchin, the man who pushed the boats out to sea
Lorchin, you'll go down in history
You said it hurt you to see those boats tied against their will
So you went down with a hammer to the docks
And you broke off all the complicated locks
You set them free
Lorchin I'm so proud of you
Mmm yeah, Lorchin we're so proud of you

Those fishermen who shouted
'We're going to kick your head in'
They didn't see your point of view
I.e. that the boats were crying out
To sail away, sail away, sail away
On their own and be free
On the stormiest night of the year
Mm-hmm yeah, you're a man who knows no fear

And Lorchin, it doesn't matter
That the village suffers now financially
It doesn't really matter
That fishing was their biggest industry
And it won't really matter
That it might take a lifetime to replace the fleet
'Cos you're a good man, Lorchin
And the main thing is, those boats run free
That's why I'm here
Making home-made broth to bring you
In your hide-out in the hills
Mm-hmm yeah, in your hide out in the hills

Where you're working on your new plan
To set the tractors free
Mm-hmm yeah, Lorchin, set those tractors free
Jayzus yeah, diddle-ee-idle-dum-dee-dee

('Lorchin' - The Nualas)

Nevertheless, despite their sins
Bless my kith and bless my kins
There they perch for all to see
Writing shit for Iain Lee...

Neil Innes - 'Montana Cafe', 'I Love Cezanne, Says Anne', everything he's ever done, basically.

Victor Lewis-Smith - 'BBC Local Radio'

The Stone Roses - that hidden bonus track on "Second Coming"

'Jump' and 'I like dancing in the park': Derek and Clive
'Brian': Python

>The Stone Roses - that hidden bonus track on "Second Coming"

What about the rest of the album?

>>The Stone Roses - that hidden bonus track on "Second Coming"
>
>What about the rest of the album?

Erm, it's fantastic?

How can that 3nd rate Led Zepplin esque album be fantastic? I'm suprised John Squire isn't blind with all the fret wanking he does on that - the whole albums overlong and bloated with far to many bad '70's 'rawk' moments. Mediocre at best.

Still not the Seahorses though

'Royal Canadian Kilted Yaksmen Song' from Ren & Stimpy (You know...the one that goes to the tune of the National Anthem: 'Our yaks are big and strong...')
'Canyon Arrow Commercial' from The Simpsons('...endorsed by a clown..')

'The Cat Came Back', Canadian Folk Song - which only counts because of the wonderful animated short based on the song.

Well, it makes me smile anyway :oP

Didn;t Rolf Harris do 'And The Cat Came Back' once?

I seem to remember it being quite good...

>Montana Caf� by Neil Innes

The TV mix of the song is superior to the LP. Ditto 'Kenny & Liza'.

Re: Stone Roses - what was that track they did which was just a different mix of 'Elephant Stone' played backwards? And 'Don't Stop' which was 'Waterfall' backwards with re-recorded percussion and special lyrics which phonetically aped the backwards vocals. Not a comedy song as such but isn't it funny how you shine?

Oasis' 'Bonehead's Bank Holiday' counts as a comedy song. Only on the vinyl of 'Morning Glory'. Curiously listenable pastiche of Troggs Tapes-style blethers at the end.

Jonathan Richmond's 'I'm A Little Aeroplane'. That's comedy. And is currently being used (the original therof) on Sesame Street.behind footage of kids running around with their arms outstretched. Class.

http://mudhole.spodnet.uk.com/~frogger/corpses/bonfires.ram

>Re: Stone Roses - what was that track they did which was just a different mix of 'Elephant Stone' played backwards?

Something about angels isn't it? - starts off really quietly, and builds - isn't the hidden track off second coming called the Fez?

>And 'Don't Stop' which was 'Waterfall' >backwards with re-recorded percussion and >special lyrics which phonetically aped the >backwards vocals. Not a comedy song as >such but isn't it funny how you shine?

An idea copied by Mogwai (The End - which is helicon 2 (i think) backwards)


>Oasis' 'Bonehead's Bank Holiday' counts as a comedy song. Only on the vinyl of 'Morning Glory'. Curiously listenable pastiche of Troggs Tapes-style blethers at the end.

Probably the best song on the album - just like Sad Song from the first - i'm joking of course. Didn't do it on the third album though did they? - which was about the time we stopped buying them.


Anything off the Auteurs 'After Murder Park' makes me laugh...

>>Re: Stone Roses - what was that track they did which was just a different mix of 'Elephant Stone' played backwards?
>
>Something about angels isn't it? - starts off really quietly, and builds - isn't the hidden track off second coming called the Fez?

Right - the full list AFAIK is:

Elephant Stone backwards is Full Fathom Five
Waterfall backwards is Don't Stop
Where angels Play backwards is Simone.
She Bangs the Drums backwards is I am Without Shoes, that's never been released but you should be able to find it on Napster if interested.

Oh, and now I remember, there's another backwards one, Guernica but I can't remember what it is.

And I think the hidden track is called The Fozz.

I reckon we'll have to agree to differ about SC PJ, and I like the seahorses too. But SC isn't all fret wanking, there's Ten Storey Love Song, Your Star Will Shine, the much maligned but I still like it Straight to the Man(the only Roses song written entirely by Brown, and a million times better than any of his solo stuff) and Tightrope, possibly the Roses best song and certainly worthy of a place on the first album.


>>And 'Don't Stop' which was 'Waterfall' >backwards with re-recorded percussion and >special lyrics which phonetically aped the >backwards vocals. Not a comedy song as >such but isn't it funny how you shine?
>
>An idea copied by Mogwai (The End - which is helicon 2 (i think) backwards)
>
>
>>Oasis' 'Bonehead's Bank Holiday' counts as a comedy song. Only on the vinyl of 'Morning Glory'. Curiously listenable pastiche of Troggs Tapes-style blethers at the end.
>
>Probably the best song on the album - just like Sad Song from the first - i'm joking of course. Didn't do it on the third album though did they? - which was about the time we stopped buying them.
>
>
>Anything off the Auteurs 'After Murder Park' makes me laugh...

In case anyone's intereasted (i know you're not) Guernica is made of Stone backwards.

Tim_e - ten story love song and tightrope are the best on that album - not sure if they're as good as songs on the first album.
I'll shut up now.

>Anything off the Auteurs 'After Murder Park' makes me laugh...

How about the Baader Meinhof album? 'There's Gonna Be an Accident' beats any 'After Murder Park' song.

>How about the Baader Meinhof album? 'There's Gonna Be an Accident' beats any 'After Murder Park' song.
>
Joe would probably agree with you - i don't think so. Everything song is a classic esp. Light Aircraft on Fire.
Althogh Baader Mienhof comes second in this competition.

Burn warehouse burn, beats there's gonna be an accident, as far as shouting crazed things goes.

Here's a few funny songs by 'serious' rock artists:
"Flying Doctor" by Hawkwind/Hawklords (they were going through an identity crisis at the time)
"Arnold Layne" by Pink Floyd (Syd Barrett)
"Effervescing Elephant" by Syd Barrett
"Mad Jack" by the Baker Gurvitz Army
"Golden Earrings" by The Enid
"Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen (I dare you to tell me that "I see a little silhouetto of a man, Scaramouch, Scaramouch, will you do the fandango" isn't funny. "Put a gun against his head, pulled the trigger, now he's dead" is also pretty funny when you think about it!")

>>How about the Baader Meinhof album? 'There's Gonna Be an Accident' beats any 'After Murder Park' song.
>>
>Joe would probably agree with you - i don't think so. Everything song is a classic esp. Light Aircraft on Fire.
>Althogh Baader Mienhof comes second in this competition.

Having said that, 'Unsolved Child Murder' is 2 minutes of pure genius.

Anything and everything by Tom Lehrer. Box set "The Remains of Tom Lehrer" now available! Forget for a while your drab, wretched lives!
"Samuel Gall majored in animal husbandry. Until they caught him at it one day..."

>Having said that, 'Unsolved Child Murder' is 2 minutes of pure genius.
>
>
I listened to that album all the way through this morning - when i got to the end, and after murder park, i noticed that i lasted exactly 2 mins on my cd player, and thought to myself 'mmmm, two minutes of perfection'.
Just thought i'd share this with you.

I got that last Auteurs album and couldn't see what the fuss was about.

"The Facts Of Life" is great though.

Cardiacs - *Insect Hoofs on Lassie*

'Lassie's on the TV, I get down on all fours and start kissing the screeen, I sit like a good dog in the hope she will give in to me"

Rock With A Policeman - The Goodies
Wonderful Noises - Bill Oddie in ISIRTA
Here Comes Another One - Monty Python
Two Little Boys In Blue - Billy Connolly
Had It Up To Hear With Men - Victoria Wood
Eddie Monson's version of My Way in Eddie Monson - A Life?
Protest Song - Neil Innes
You're Gorgeous as sung by Tim Brooke-Taylor in I's Sorry I Haven't A Clue

And I agree with whoever said Hooray For British Films by Alexei Sayle

PS. Is it true that Ben Elton sang I Want To Be A Cowboy on some TV show, whilst possibly dressed as a cowboy? If so that sounds hilariously bad!

Dunno, though I read he'd dueted Living Doll (or Summer Holiday) with Rik Mayall for Australian radio during a tour once.

George Harrison sang "I'd Like to be a Pirate" on Rutland Weekend Television. Close?

Also:
"Mummy, I Don't Like my Meat" by the Goodies - brilliantly tasteless
"Persecuting Pigeons in Trafalgar Square" and "Masochist's Rag" by Bill Oddie on ISIRTA - both shameless ripoffs of Tom Lehrer's ideas, but fun nonetheless
"Boring Song" by the Hee Bee Gee Bees (AKA Status Quid) on Radio Active and on (long deleted) vinyl

Tom Lehrer - 'In Old Mexico'
"Rover was killed by a Pontiac
And the killing was done with such grace and finesse
That the driver was awarded
Both ears and the tail..."

King Missile - Steal Stuff From Work
King Missile - Jesus Was Way Cool
King Missile - Cheesecake Truck ("it really was excellent cheesecake")

Jock-o-rama by Dead Kennedys

>I got that last Auteurs album and couldn't see what the fuss was about.
>
>"The Facts Of Life" is great though.

What fuss, exactly? it got to about 150 in the charts or something.

1) Derek and Clive's 'Non Stop Dancer/My Mum Song' and 'Jump' and 'I Can't Shit' which must surely be the best song title ever.

2) Victoria Wood's 'Freda and Barry'

3) 'Buckingham Blues', 'The Check's In The Mail', 'Mr Frump In The Iron Lung', in fact, any thong by Al Yancovic

4) 'The Penis Song' and 'The Galaxy Song', both from 'Monty Python's Meaning Of Life'

"The Bicycle Song" - Pink Floyd

"Vienna" - Vic Reeves (from "Ruby Trax", a long-deleted NME 3-CD set of cover versions: everyone else plays it straight, but Vic opts to utterly destroy Ultravox's finest moment for anyone who ever hears his unique version - I'm fairly sure "Hitler dwelt in this land... / And Van Morrison was born here" aren't in the original lyrics, while the Belgian police *definitely* didn't feature in the original...)

Any of Snuff's unique speed-punk-metal cover versions ("I Will Survive", or maybe "Shake'N'Vac")

Anything by Mrs Miller (bizarrely out-of-tune middle-aged recording artist from the 60s, whose mangled versions of standards like "Strangers In The Night" and "Moon River" have to be heard to be believed. It was never clear whether or not she was in on her own joke)

"I'm Walking Backwards For Christmas" - The Goons (just for the look on people's faces when they hear it for the first time)

The whole of "Laker!" - Not The Nine O'Clock News

And, indeed, "(Oh, Oh, Oh Means) I Respect You" - Not The Nine O'Clock News


More as we get them...

The Snuff version of "The Rockefeller Skank" is better than the Fatboy Slim version. Dunno if they've ever recorded it though.

"Ruby Trax" featured the Manic Street Preachers version of "Suicide Is Painless (Theme From MASH)" which, though not funny, acquired irony and poignancy later on.

The Gasman Cometh - Flanders & Swann

and the one about the rusty bedstead, which I haven't heard in years so can't remember it's title.

Both delightful old fashioned comedy wit.


Practically all of the Jilted John LP, which as pointed out earlier, could have been a cheap cash in lp from the "gordon is a moron" success, but wasn't - it was fantastic. ditto for Neils Heavy Concept Album.

The Grease Band and Bill Oddie's version of "On Ilkley Moor B'aht at" which I'd love to get a copy of.

>"The Bicycle Song" - Pink Floyd
Is this 'Bike'? I've got a version of this by Fortran 5 with all the lyrics recreated from Sid James sample. Fantastic.

>"Vienna" - Vic Reeves (from "Ruby Trax", a long-deleted NME 3-CD set of cover versions: everyone else plays it straight, but Vic opts to utterly destroy Ultravox's finest moment for anyone who ever hears his unique version - I'm fairly sure "Hitler dwelt in this land... / And Van Morrison was born here" aren't in the original lyrics, while the Belgian police *definitely* didn't feature in the original...)

I'd forgotten about this - this is *really* funny, especially the lines about the Belgian police.

>Any of Snuff's unique speed-punk-metal cover versions ("I Will Survive", or maybe "Shake'N'Vac")

The entire 'Flibbydibbydob' EP is essential - apparently they've done a version of 'Purple Haze' has anyone heard it?

Anyone out there ever heard of the 7" single "Punk Junk"/"Soft Punk" by the Water Pistols (State Records, 1977)? Possibly the best ever pisstake of the punk phenomenon ever.
"Last night at the Rutland open-air punk festival, punk celebrity Dick Capitate removed his owm head in front of an audience of lwmmings and his immediate relatives. Chief Inspector Ed Less is reported to have said, 'heeeeuuuuurrrrrggggghhhhh!' " (Fade out on hysterical giggling.)

Oh, yes, and "She Moved the Dishes First" by Supercharge!

NB: "lwmming" = Welsh lemming

>The Grease Band and Bill Oddie's version of "On Ilkley Moor B'aht at" which I'd love to get a copy of.

I've got it on vinyl.

1. Crumble Song - The Lorraine Bowen Experience
2. Look No Strings - Chumbawumba
3. On Again - Jake Thackray
4. Hurdy Gurdy Mushroom Man - Neil
5. Stonehenge - Spinal Tap
6. Bike - Syd Barrett's Pink Floyd
7. Say Goodbye, It Could Be Worse - Lee & Herring
8. Brigitte The Nun - The Nualas
9. Rotasound Strings - The Who
10. Funky Moped - Jasper Carrott
11. Sex In The 70s - The Tracy Brothers
12. The Laughing Gnome - David Bowie
13. Deteriorata - National Lampoon
14. The Man Who Thinks He's Jesus - Corky & The Juice Pigs
15. School Song - Monty Python
16. Sparrow Song - The Goodies
17 The Bride Stripped Bare By Batchelors - The Bonzo Dog Band
18. Star Collector - The Monkees
19. Cheese Alarm - Robyn Hitchcock
20 Labio Dental Fricative - Vivian Stanshall

More more more...

Funny Little Man by aphex twin always makes me laugh - especially the bit where the child starts to got impatient.