The juxtaposition of the words "Keith Allen's Cock" with the words "kinder surprise" conjures up several very disturbing images.

The things they'll do to sell little chocolate eggs these days...

"Mummy, where can I get something that is chocolate and something to play with?"

And a surprise...

What's the big problem? Keith Allen's world revolves around his cock anyway. Was it six children by six different women I heard? He still thinks hanging around with Loaded-types confirms his masculinity and justifies his arrogance.

Good in 'Martin Chuzzlewitt', mind. Even if that did largely involve shouting at women.

And Born to Run was excellent.

>Keith Allen's world revolves around his cock anyway. Was it six children by six different women I heard?

That is hardly surprising. I feel impregnated just thinking about him!

>That is hardly surprising. I feel impregnated just thinking about him!

I know, you can hear it oozing out every available pore. Where's it currently oozing to? Anyone know.

>I know, you can hear it oozing out every available pore. Where's it currently oozing to? Anyone know.

Bent would I be right in thinking this is a euphemism for something? Is the answer a flannel?

Nope, where/who is he directing it at? Some other naive girl half his age.

Maybe they use a flannel.

>Nope, where/who is he directing it at? Some other naive girl half his age.
>

Hey Bent that's bit unfair! Maybe it hadn't occurred to you that the so-called 'naive' girl was the one USING Keith for his sexual physique and needless to say, magnificent cock?

And you accuse Kieth of being a mysoginist!

P.S Please ignore my reference to a flannel.

>Hey Bent that's bit unfair! Maybe it hadn't occurred to you that the so-called 'naive' girl was the one USING Keith for his sexual physique and needless to say, magnificent cock?

How shallow of them. I withdraw those comments if he withdraws his tumescence out of said fictitious girl. It can't be healthy.

>How shallow of them. I withdraw those comments if he withdraws his tumescence out of said fictitious girl.

You only find it shallow Bent because you are threatened by this sort of attitude. You have mysoginist written all over your tumescence.

>It can't be healthy

Well with his perrenial supply of Listerine added to the equation I think things are bound to be very cleanly.

>You have mysoginist written all over your tumescence.

Nice tattoo, don't you think? I was surprised 'mysoginist' fitted on as well.

>Nice tattoo, don't you think? I was surprised 'mysoginist' fitted on as well.

Bent you are kidding yourself that it's a tattoo. Get yourself down to the clinic, I hate to break it to you but 'tattoos' can rarely be caught from promiscuous nights out, and even more rarely are they written in brail.

That'll explain why it's on the circumference then.

And you're reading far too much into my name, btw.

Come now, what's in a name Bent?

But come to think of it, does 'Halo' in any way refer to your 'circumference'?

I'm sick to the teeth with Keith Allen's cock. Ramming it down our throats all the bloody time. This really is too much to swallow. Your constant bickering and mouthing off has gobbled up rational thought. This bone of contention, sucks.

Gee - A Freudian dream: "Maladaptiveness in the oral stage, i think..."

I didn't know you felt so strongly, I apologise.

Sorry to broach this again but...



I got around to watching Shallow Grave and my love of the cock has been rekindled!

Good film.