Husband! Have you got the tea on, I'm starved. Guess which advert just came on? Wave yer hands in the air.....#mighty mighty mints mighty mighty mints mighty mighty mints#
*sniff*

<weeps>

It's just not the same without a giggling dyke sitting next to me!

Nor for me, without a sniggering pooftah!

When did you ever sit next to a sniggering pooftah?

on a bus, once, it was awful.

<vomits>

That must have been so awful for one so dignified!

I simply wrapped my cape about my face, and ignored the deviant.

Did you put your feet up on the seat in front of you, and make a dent in the chair?

Yes, and I was draped in garish attire, which was too small. Also...J'ai saggy tits et une fat belly.

Man, you sound like someone I once saw on a bus.

She was on the X46 from Exeter to Torquay.

Urrgh, why would someone wish to leave a purely cosmopolitan metropolis like Exeter and head into the slums of Torquay man? You is talking rubbish!

Maybe they fancied getting back to nature for a bit?

Trying to find themselves?

Yep, and rolling in dog shit.

Sounds like fun!

Mmmm, to me too!

I'm bored, shall we go out and paint policemans hats yellow?

Yes, then run off chanting 'HAHAHAHAHAHAAA, YELLOW MAN!!'

Yaaaaaaaaaay!!
*fetches yellow paint*

Can we throw wee on them?

If that's your thing...

Naaah, just checkin'!!

Phew, man.

Thought you was going all freaky on me, like.

Whooooh no, that's 'Greaso' freaky that!

You're right.

Let us never mention Grease again.

Not even the smash hit film?

#We'll be together like shammalammlamma-doboopyboopdip-do-wop#

Yes, even the film.

John Travolta...<shudder>

Oi, slag, why haven't you posted in here?

Oops!!! My bad!

Grease was a splendid film, I particularly admire the skills of Olivia Neutron Bombs sexy ass! She be fina than a mo'fo'!

Or skankier than a piss bag.

Just cos John Revolta turned ya down!

Man, I wouldn't touch his with yours!

*snort*

Sez you!

Let's put it to the test then!

<doesn't touch his with hers>

See?

Y'know, I think you've got a point!

I always have a point!

Want to see it?

Is Ben Hur on?

Mmmmmm...Charlton Heston.

Or whatever, or was he in the other one?

Er....nope, it's gone!

Good old Charlie!

He makes the other Charlie look like Bella Emberg!

Unforgettable.

Hunnam-Emberg
Dimmock-Baroness Young

Wincy 'come suck my parrot' Willis.

Rusty 'Boooooots' Lee

Bob 'spit and shine' Carolgees.

Cheryl 'monkey buffer' Baker

Simon 'pick at my hair' Groom.

Peter 'Me? Gay?' Duncan

Lu 'give me another name' Lu.

<cracks up>

This is too much man!

Man, you can never have too much of laughter!

"You get out......."

What is it with you and that saying today?

Was it written on the note in your cookie or something?

No, it's me new Mantra!

Ray?

Jimmy?

No, Ray.

No, Ray.

What? Could you repeat that?

No, Ray.

Yes, Ray.

Three bags full, Ray.

muhhh bahuss!

Was that you being a sheep?

No, I was being Eminem.

Oh...*that* guy.

What? My name is what, my name is what, my name is waccawaccawaccawacca.

That's a real great song, mate!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I cuss yo' momma.

Are you...talentless?

Shut yo' bitch ass mouth man.

No, shut yours, scum.

Oooh, I bet his mother's ashamed of him.

#I ashamed her, she's a ho, man, skank, mo#

Get to your room Edgar, NOW!

#Man, you is skanked up to da max mum, you fuckin' bitch man#

I'm cancelling your subscription to Edge!

#Cancel that subscription man, and you'll feel my fuckin' fist in your face, you scotum sucking minge ho man#

<puts his N64 in the loft>

That'll teach you!

#Don't matter man, because I have my PSX, skankbag. It's a rockin' bit o' kit, hoop#

<flushes his memory cards down the bog>

#Man, them memory cards corrupt my DVD player anyway, Sony are so wise and great!#

<burns his copy of DC Samba Des Amigos>

<doesn't weep>

It's ok to cry, let it all out!

But...I don't want to.

I won't laugh, I promise!

But it's a Sega game.

It's not worth getting upset over.

Dreamcast boyy!!

See what Stuart Campbell says on Digi and weeeeeep!