How many times have I heard you utter that phrase now, wifey?

37 times my gorgeous macho hubkins! and you *love* it!

OKAY I admit it!!!

I LOVE IT, there, are you happy??

harsh!!
<pushes him over>

aaaah, still got the old magic!

Ohhhhh, big fat dangly scrotum!

there's nothing for you here. This is a TV forum for tv-forum people

Look, Edward!!

Chilllldren!!

*yawn*


They're not children, they're monsters... !

They are?

Bloody hell.

IMHO the second episode was one of the weakest so far... not particularly funny and far to many attempts to get plot lines and running gags started...

The second episode wasn't as good as it should have been, but still incredibly good.

I can I can't!

<ahem>

Nope, sorry I didn't think it was good, let alone incredibly good... hope it improves!

Just who do you think you are, voicing an opinion?

Tch.

I'm very sorry... :)

Hello.

I've heard from people who went to the advanced screenings (through the tLoG onelist if you're wondering how...) that ep. 3's not much cop either. But eps 4, 5 & 6'll more than make up for the lack of pure quality in the previous ones...

Cheerio,

Rachel

Well, I've heard that 4,5 and 6 tend to play a bit heavy on the 'Ewww' factor and the series doesn't really pick up - we shall have to judge for ourselves though! (Now there's an original concept..)

Hoorah for cliches, anyway.

The ratings for episode one were certainly good, though.

I'm begining to think I don't have what it takes to be a League of Gentlemen fan.

Episode 4 was just plain nasty. Not even Reece's bum brightened it up for me.

What was funny about a dog exploding on a fire? I wasn't a fan of the cow scene in series one, but this series seems to be full of this sort of humour. There was so much more to series one than this.

And Chubby Brown? Don't get me started on that!! "It's a f*cking pleasure." Ooh, hilarious, I think you'll agree.

I'm off to listen to my tapes of the radio series to remind myself of how funny they can be without them going out of their way to make you sick.

Sorry, I'm just piised off that I buggered up my recording of 'Behind the Scenes' on BBC Choice last night.

Don't let Sui hear you say that!

I'm sorry, It's just that I *really* wanted this series to be as good as the first, and it's not (IMO). 4 episodes in, and I'm still waiting for the bits you want to watch over and over again. :o(

I don't know I thought the 'Dave' bits were classic...nowt much else though

the Dave bits were brilliant. This weeks 'orange juice' scene was good, and the nasty conversation between Iris and Mrs Levinson was priceless.

Ssssh, Sui, you know I don't watch it til Sunday!

>I'm begining to think I don't have what it takes to be a League of Gentlemen fan.
>
>Episode 4 was just plain nasty. Not even Reece's bum brightened it up for me.
>
>What was funny about a dog exploding on a fire? I wasn't a fan of the cow scene in series one, but this series seems to be full of this sort of humour. There was so much more to series one than this.
>
>And Chubby Brown? Don't get me started on that!! "It's a f*cking pleasure." Ooh, hilarious, I think you'll agree.
>
>I'm off to listen to my tapes of the radio series to remind myself of how funny they can be without them going out of their way to make you sick.
>
>Sorry, I'm just piised off that I buggered up my recording of 'Behind the Scenes' on BBC Choice last night.

Couldn't agree with you more... no really I couldn't that's why I've quoted your whole message. The first episode of the 2nd series showed some promise (with the Dave thing) but since then it's been mostly 'Let's play up the Ewww factor' - easy gags to please the plebby public.

They're capable of some much more that what they've delivered... (the bts thing was also rubbish, trying to anaylise something that doesn't need anaylising)

Woh, thankyou. Someone agrees with me! The email groups and message board are overflowing with praise... It's beyond me. They also say that episode 3 was the worst one, but this episode was my actually my favourite. I think that shows something...

I do agree, this series seems to be playing more on the Gent's love for horror movies....but even though it's slightly different from the first series, I still like it. I thought there were selected bits that I want to play over and over again...
Anyone want a major spoiler about Tubbs and Edward?!(I've seen the whole series...)
Sian x

Episode 3 was also my favourite, because of the whole Pauline/Ross thing, and Stella and Charlie; also another bit which I can't remember, but it was good, trust me. Ep4 was very weak, and Ep2 was embarrassingly bad. I find them to be funniest when the humour/weirdness is accidental, not blatant.

Re: the poor ickle doggy; the gents themselves admitted that they only stuck that bit in because they had a surplus of theatrical blood, and wanted to get a cheap laugh.

Yeah, that's a great reason to do the joke... deary me...

No spoilers please...

Also, I think it's a fairly good sign that people have run out of ideas for a character when they send them mad in a comedy way... a pity as there were plenty of things that could of been done with Pauline.

Also, when Roy Chubby Brown comes out as the Major, it was completely unness for his assistant to mention he has 'a reputation'... it's Roy Chubby Brown, we get the joke thank you!

In summary, too many obvious gags and far too much ewww factor... it's lost it's intelligence and acute observations.

Blimey, sorry - I'll stop sounding so elitist now... no, I mean now.

Ah, well.

I acnt believe that they've killed off Tubbs and Edward..or have they?

burried alive.....

Surely not...?

don't be silly, i was only talking to them yesterday!

Deja vu!

FOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRR!
you want the FOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRR.

well....why didn't ya say so, duuuuh! bus drivers, eh?

"This is actually the wrong bus, if you wait, the Number 4 will be along shortly! Have a nice day!"

aw, how sweet and kind of you Mr Driver!

<wakes up>

"FFFOOOOOUUUURRRRRRRRRR, you DOZY FREAKS!!"

*runs away*

Why do they staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare?

Because we're queer, of course!

Fair play to 'em!

Oh yeah! Silly me, i forgot that one crucial factoid! Filthy feckin' queers......urgh.

Sick, sick minds...we're awful in every sense of the word!

apart from our angelic faces!

Oh yes, they shine like...like...baubles, or something.

so radiant and serene are we, except when someone mentions.....


F I N C H E S ! !

<dives for cover>

Let me liiiiivvve!!

Fear not young Starkers, i shaaaaall protect you!
*rolls him up and puts him in a wheelie bin*

*sighs* this is no good...i miss him too much

<makes a 'John!' sock puppet>

Hello Suiii, you're the best, thank you for protecting me in the wheeeliebin!

Hello Suiii, you're the best, thanks for protecting me in a wheel...wait a finch flapping minute!

What's going on here?

Well....i was so miserable and lonely without you, that i made a sock puppet to keep me company. Only thing is......he's started to answer back...

But all John!'s are weak and feeble!

naaah, they just think they are!

This one knows it to be true!

Would I be marrying you if you were? NO!

But even you can't deny I'm feeble and weak!

No-one can!

I scream at the sight of a little bird!

at least you didn't spill slush all over yourself! Blue slush on a white shirt!

At least you didn't have a FINCH ON YOUR HEAD!!!!!

That maybe, but i *saw* the whole thing, which was way worse!

Hardly!!

I was in a terrible state with that *thing* perched on my ear!

ohhhhh the flashbacks. mummy, make it stooooooopppp!

I'll never forget it.

It was a defining moment of my life.

are you going to tell that to the admissions board at uni?

Err...no.

Pleaaaaase tell them! Then in the future, if you fuck up in anyway, blame it on da finch!

That's a very good idea, actually.

DAS FINCHEZZZ!

i reckon that finch killed Kazooie.

Damn that finch then!

Cosa Nestra!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Suiii, that joke was great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ypu're the Master of all comedy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And you are the best professional wrestler I know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But you are seriously the healthiest eater in the known universe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and you are the bravest man alive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And you hate mash, I know that to be fact!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

mash is foul!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Especially when cheese is added!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sounds disgusting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sounds fucking vile!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

it's on the list!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hate Smash, and the Smash robots!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If someone sent you a Smash magnet, you'd hate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'd throw it in the bin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'd better not send one then!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No, you'd better not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*rofl*

This is too much fun!

No it isn't!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's weak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Too orangey for crows!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'll be your dog!

WOOFWOOFWOOFWOOF

What a beatiful day!

Um Bongo, Um Bongo, they drink it in the Congo!!

Le Shark - we have Tea!

Sanyo-We don't make biscuits for anyone else

Mrs Miggins - every little helps!

Bisto-The Taste Of A New Generation

The BBC - we've shown our pastry to mother

C4- Full of Meaty Goodness

Dorothy Perkins - we shove snouts into life

Have a Break, Have A tub of Flora

Do not underestimate the power of Somerfield.

Rice Crispies- Just Do It

Woolworths - it's in the game

9 out of 10 cats prefer Ready Brek

Quality Street - every little helps

Thank OXO it's Friday!

Vileda Super Mop - how do you eat yours?

Happiness is a cigar called Smash!

The BBC - it turns the milk brown.

Beanz Meanz Fixodent!

Oxford Pocket Dictionary - keeps hunger locked up til lunch.

>Woh, thankyou. Someone agrees with me! The email groups and message board are overflowing with praise...

*ahem*. I wasn't overflowing with praise, Rachel! ;o)

We agree with you!

Oh you insincere little boyy!!

I was being serious momma!

I really, really was!

*nods*

get in your closet and pray!

<whispers>

Bitch.

<slap>

BAD BOYY!

<weeps>

You promised you'd never hit me again!

Can I just sorta prod you in the chest like this then?
<prod prod prod>

Hmmm...preferable...but still not ideal.

*sigh*
You pick a punishment then!!!


When will you learn that *I* know whats best for you, eh?

That'll be the day when Bob Carolgees gets rid of Spit the Dog.

That is to say, never.

Hmmmmmmm!! Thassit, no mash for a week!

But I'll have mash tonight.

I'll let it drip down my chin.

mmmmmmmm, may I join you?

You certainly can.

Say 7.00pm for 7.30pm?

*checks diary*
Sure thing! Smart or casual attire?

How about a mixture of both?

Oooh OK, my cowboy hat, avec my combats and funki purple shirt?

That's rather edging towards total casual.

But the hat and shirt are supersmart!

Ha!

I'll believe that when I see it!

Pah, *if* you see it!

You sound like your throat is full of sausages.

chip-o-la-tas

#Chip-oh-lah-ta, what a wonderful phrase...Chip-oh-lah-ta, ain't no passing craze#

#they're little sozzies that keep for days and day, chip-o-o-latas...#

#All covered in sauce#

#Chipolata you and i knoooooooooooow
that the Ketchup comes and it goes and the chips are eaten........fry once more, like you did before, eat a new chip-chipolataaaa#

#Chipolata, what a lovely little sausage it is, eh?#

You're so talented!

Well, that's the general view of the world, yes!

*sniff* and to think, someone as great as you, still loves little old me *weeps*

I love you Man!

I like the way you say 'Man' with a capital 'M'.

It proves I'm like a God to you.

*bows*

<speechless>

*tearful*

Bless you my child.

*kisses his ring*


NO! The one on his finger!
Tsk.

But I'm not wearing a ring...

Um.

Urgh! Knobbly fingers!

But my fingers are nowhere near my ring...

Um.

<shoots him>

Nice gun!

Care to 'shove' it in my 'ring'?

No...have a carrot instead!

Shush!

Courgette?

Think bigger.

Eww maaan, Pringles tube?

*lugs a marrow into the topic*

Delivery for a Mr. Starkers...?

He's out booking the Church, for our imminent wedding, I'll sign for it!

<walks in>

<takes off cap>

Eh up, what's going on in here?

Delivery for you husband!

What's all this 'ere gubbins, you dopey old scrote?

Masturbatory vegEtables!


Oooh, that'd be a great name for a band.....y'know, we *really* should form a band!

What, with that name?

Man, Radio One would never put us on its playlist!

So? We don't wanna be on their playlist with S Club 7 and Lolly!

But I really, really wanna be on R1's playlist man!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You wanna dance like Britney?????????????????

Dunno about that, but I'm certain that Gemini FM will love us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love Gemini!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've never heard anyone say a bad word about it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Such a varied broadcasting schedule!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And the adverts are so good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish I could get it here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know you do, believe me, I know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*weeps*

Damn radiowaves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They sure is damn fine.

Miiiiiiiiiiighty fine!

#La-la-la-la-la when the sun goes down, Who-ooh, who-ooh!#

You should be on TOTP with them skills man!

You seriously think I could go that far?

Without a doubt! DJ dY2Ke and MC HoJohnMo!

<wiggles arse>

Man, we're the best!

Without a shadow of a doubt my grooVy friend!

That was a cheeky little shadow.

I'm full of cheeKiness me!

Special K?

Bleurgh!
Kardboard Krunchies!

I prefer Coco Pops myself!

Really? You can't like them that much, I've never even seen you eat any!

I didn't eat them in your presence!

Co(vert)co Pops?

Um...Super Secretive Coco Pops.

It's a new variety.

Where can I buy this cereal?

It's a secret.

*sobs*

Wanna.

Sssshut up.

Gonna steal your John Williams CD!

You'd better run egg!

Could that bassoon have come in any more late?

Um...moving.

How deviliciously satirical!

If you don't stop that I'll stick that bassoon up your loose arse.

Eh?

I wasn't talking to you, Hibbsy.

Oh! Huhuhuhuh!!!

#Because you held me tight, and stole a kiss in the night, ba ba ba bom#

Want some cake?

Why?

It was on special, so I bought you some!!

Oooh, you feed me well!