1. Chris Morris’ exasperated muttering of ‘God’s trousers!’ at the close of one episode was a compromise job. Morris had originally wanted ‘God’s shiny bollocks’, but Iannucci intervened. Perhaps to prove that he was no longer constrained by such censorship, Morris often slipped the legendary ‘Christ’s fat cock!’ exclamation into his Radio 1 shows. He has, to this day, not forgiven Iannucci for splicing out his bollocks.

2. When the second series (April - May 1992) was repeated in the summer of 1992, it was given the old Loose Ends timeslot of 10am on Saturday mornings. However, due to the sacrosanct news bulletin which was scheduled for this time, the episodes were each cut short by approximately two minutes.

3. The 1992 double-cassette compilation is sadly the worst example of edit-politics. The PRS edits (e.g., Dave Edmunds’ ‘Crawling From The Wreckage’ in the ‘Disaster At Big Street Station’ sketch) are the least of our worries here. In fact, it only exists as an edited compilation at all due to petty power struggles between the Morris/Iannucci camp and Avalon (the agency which represents Stewart Lee and Richard Herring).

4. The parody of I’m Sorry I Haven’t A Clue (from the first episode) was also cut from the 'Later on Radio 4' sketch on the cassette. Although it may have been written by Lee & Herring, the item would have been removed anyway because the panel game’s unclearable theme music (from the film Monte Carlo Or Bust) could not be separated from the dialogue. For the record, here is the parody, probably the funniest thing in the whole series.

ANNOUNCER (DOON MACKICHAN) ...Mary Goldring will be in a chair at 7:20 this evening. On Saturday at 12:25 there’s an other chance to hear a special three-hour edition of ‘I’m Sorry I Have To Appear In This Programme’.

The following is an interview with Stewart Lee, Richard Herring and Peter Baynham conducted by the editors of this site for a one-off fanzine called 'Christ's Fat Cock' way back in November 1994 (so suck our fucking cocks, John Walker...).  Bits of it were later brought to a wider audience by Danny Wallace for 'Comedy Review' magazine.

FACTUALLY INACCURATE

If you're foolish enough to buy the official BBC Radio Collection release of 'On The Hour', you'll notice a few indescretions - 1) That it does not contain full episodes but two edited amalgams from each series, 2) That it omits a lot of essential, not to mention very funny, sketches, and 3) That Stewart Lee and Richard Herring's names are non-too-casually omitted from the inlay card.  The three tie in of course - all traces of Lee & Herring's involvement with the series, including character names, have been removed.  Some would argue that this makes the release unrepresentative of 'On The Hour'.  Rumours abound of 'legal problems' and their apparent dislike of a certain other member of the creative team.  Lee & Herring did not contribute to 'The Day Today' and their gap was filled by Peter Baynham.  Christ's Fat Cock met up with Stewart, Rich and Pete after a Fist Of Fun gig in Aberystwith and requested elaboration.  They kindly complied and bought many rounds of drinks which may or may not have contributed to the home-truths evicted here.  Firstly we asked Stewart 'So what have you got against Patrick Marber?'

STU: I've got loads of revenge from beyond my death that I'm gonna land on him.

(Here, Stewart brandished his wallet and pulled out a card which read "Person to contact in the event of my death - Patrick Marber".  Much hilarity erupted).

STU: No, it's just that when we got 'done over' by 'On The Hour', he was the person who seemed most happy about it really, whereas everyone else was a bit "Oh, sorry, it's a bit embarrassing"...

RICH: We did a show with him in Edinburgh - about three years ago just before it all went wrong - called 'the dum show', with Coogan and him.  And they were really...  I mean, Coogan, fair enough, he's very talented and you don't feel as bad when he's arrogant towards you, but Marber was equally arrogant and not quite as talented, I would argue.

STU: He did stand-up for a bit, then he went to Paris to try to become a novelist but he never really got round to it.  He thought all he had to do was hang around the Seine and drink coffee, like they did in the twenties.  Then, when he came back, he just tried to get in with everything that was going, really.  And as soon as he found something that really was going somewhere he just crapped on everyone else.

RICH: So...he's a bit...  We don't hate him.  We quite like him in a way.

STU: It's become a bit of a joke now.

RICH: But it was convenient to have him as the scapegoat to blame.

STU: Because we were grumpy with them all, but he was the only one who wasn't sensitive about it.  He seemed pleased 'cos it meant more power and writing work for him.  He came to 'On The Hour' as a performer, and then started to edge in.  When he first started to come to writing meetings it was a joke, y'know, but now he's like, a main part of it.  But it's good he's getting something...  He's 48 now... (LAUGHTER)

So what actually went wrong?  Why were they 'done over' and why were their sketches removed from the official release?  CFC brought up the worryingly clever (and rather petty) way that even character names of theirs were shortened.  "Lionel Cosgrave in Glossop in Derbyshire" became "Lionel Glossop in Derbyshire" for instance.  Was it Armando Iannucci's job to hack out such offenders?  Apparently so.

RICH: He had to stay up all night doing it.

CFC: Was he on your side?

RICH: No.

STU: We took it to the bridge there 'cos that tape was being released at the time we were hassling for...  See, for the TV series, they wanted to give us a 13-minute commission I think, which would have been a lot of money, short term, 13 minutes a week TV money, six weeks, great, but that would be it.  What we wanted was a deal whereby we retained ownership of characters we'd helped to create so that when Patrick Marber and Steve Coogan toured them around we don't just get ripped off.  But they wouldn't have that, and this was while that tape was being put together.  Most comedy writers just think 'fuck it', y'know...

RICH: Our agent thought they shouldn't do the 'On The Hour' tape, they should wait until it got to telly and then put it out through a major record company.

STU: Instead of through BBC Enterprises who are notoriously bad at promoting their own material.

RICH: And I don't think many real fans have got that tape, apart from very many members of the public, so he was right.  And it all hinged on £50 or something they wouldn't let us have.  He said, alright, fine, and had to stay up all night cutting...  So it was all a bit messy and unpleasant.

STU: And another thing they do, right, if journalists refer to us as "the brains behind 'On The Hour'", which a lot of them do because the bits that tend to get singled out and written up in reviews - not all the time but at least 50% of the time - have been ours, they write letters to them, Armando and Chris, saying "Don't ever do this again - it's factually inaccurate".  So it's this sort of re-writing of history whereby we're removed from the photographs.

RICH: We're Trotsky...ice pick...kind of thing.  But anyway, it's all water under the bridge, it's the best for everyone I think.

STU: But on the other hand, it's worth mentioning this: When we were supposed to go to the British Comedy Awards for 'On The Hour', Armando made a point of making sure there were enough seats for all the writers to go, which was good.  However, on the other hand, when we were nominated for a Writer's Guild Award, it was during this sort of dispute and he didn't tell us about it.  We could have gone to the Writer's Guild Award - John Osbourne was there making a speech and everything - to pick up our fucking award.  And the speech Armando made at the ceremony - he collected the award as the producer and said that writers were given too much credit and he was fed up with them, and made a sort of joke about it.  We only found out in the newspapers that we'd got a fucking Writer's Guild Award.  We found out from a bloke in a lift!

RICH: He said "Well done!", we went "What?"

STU: I would have loved to have gone to the Writer's Guild Awards and they didn't even tell us about it.

Peter Baynham had remained curiously quiet throughout all this talk of back-stabbing and general bad behaviour.  "Pete's Judases us!", grinned Rich.

STU: Pete got off with the writing job for 'The Day Today'.  And took it.  Which is fair enough to be honest.

RICH: Because he's never gonna be a big star like us so he has to take the work whenever he can.

CFC: Pete, any thoughts on Patrick Marber before we move on?

PETE: Thoughts on Patrick Marber...  He owes me about £250.  (LAUGHTER)

STU: That's right, yeah, because he'd ripped off a load of stuff Pete had written for his Observer column, then rang him up after it had been printed and said "I'll pay you for it".  That was six months ago and he still hasn't done it.  And, when we used to write with him, when we worked at his house, he used to charge me for any phone calls I made.

RICH: And he owns his own house.

STU: Which the family gave him.

The 'Daimler Jeffries' news reports in 'On The Hour' (where a condemned murderer chooses newer and more exciting ways to be executed each time) were co-written by Lee and Herring.  The sketch idea made it to the TV version, though the charcater was re-christened 'Chapman Baxter'.  Did they get a royalty for their part in creating this character?

STU: No, 'cos it was, like, a team of people, a lot of it.  We'd bring scripts in and they'd get kind of workshopped, so it's arguable...  We came up with a name for that and, like...

RICH: It was a subject we were into and had done a lot of stuff on serial-killers, but my memory is that Armando came in and said "We want to do something about these American reporters", so it's basically a conglomerate of ideas.  But it's hard to say...that's why they had to change the name on the tape.

STU: That is the problem.  When we got our name cut out of it, it was really hard for us to say exactly what was ours, but they did go to the trouble of... any proper-nouns that they remembered we'd come up with, they re-edited in a different way.  But loads of stuff people like isn't on there, like a lot of the news reports we did and the statue seeping blood, the Urine Man, the Week Ending parody.  A lot of those people have been really helpful to us as well though so it's like six of one...

RICH: Yeah, we still work with them.

STU: Funnily enough, it came at sort of the right time 'cos I was starting to get kind of...  I was always motivated out of irritation and annoyance and this feeling of having been hard done by.  And about two years ago we got a British Comedy Award, we were writing our own radio series and I was doing well at stand-up and everything was going fine so I was starting to feel like I didn't really have anything left to say.  Then, when I was fucked over by these people, I became irritated again and was able to have a new lease of life.  (LAUGHTER)

RICH: So you thank them more than anything.

STU: Yeah.  But I think it's useful at the start 'cos what happened is...  When I quit my job I thought "Great, no more being blamed for things you haven't done in the office, no more office politics", etc.  And we had a nice two years of dabbling in comedy and everyone was really nice.  Then when we got into this horrible business mess I realised that you can never really leave all that behind.  What it's meant now is that we're really careful about contracts and stuff and we always chack that...  We've got an absurdly good deal for the TV series.

RICH: And we're pretty much in control.  We've got Sarah Smith, our producer, but apart from that we're pretty much in control, with her, and we respect her, so...

STU: Another thing it made us think about as well - and Pete's found this, writing with Chris - is that unless it's your face at the front, you don't get the credit.  Like, when we did 'Nimrod' the newspapers said "Some of this is obviously influenecd by 'On The Hour'", but we'd fucking written 'On The Hour'!  So unless it's your name nailed to the thing, it's actually...  There's been a lot of opportunities where, us writing together and Pete on his own, we could have got paid quite a lot for doing other things for other people but we started to turn it down in the end because you start to become known as these sort of 'jobbing' writers.  Short term, you get a lot of money, but in the long term, where are you?  We wrote a bit for Michael Barrymore about three years ago and we met all these older writers, about 50 years old, who are just sort of jobbing comedy writers and were really sort of...  Eddie Braben who wrote for Morcambe and Wise.  No-one knows who he is, and he just wanders around TV studios trying to flog gags to people.  It's the saddest thing.

PETE: It's like with 'The Day Today', there was very little...  I think I found my name mentioned in one piece about the whole thing.  And I was in the press-release.  But the journalists just aren't interested.

STU: The way that was marketed - by 'whoever' - was as this team of six people in suits, like some sort of cool... like 'Tin Machine' or something, standing there, and like, they didn't have a bloke on the end who wasn't in a suit with a typewriter!

PETE: We had this really rubbish PR company who just didn't understand, y'know.

RICH: The good side of not doing it ('The Day Today') is that we've been able to do our own thing that we're in control of.  The three of us.

And that would appear to cover everything.  Though there was one more important question niggling at least one member of the editorial team of CFC.  So, dammit, we threw caution to the wind and asked it...

CFC: What we want to know is...  What's it like sharing a 'comedy bed' with Rebecca Front?

RICH: (LAUGHTER) She's strangely...unsexual in real life.  I suppose to a lot of comedy fans she's their 'Julia Sawalha'...sort of personal wank-fantasy...

STU: She's so good...all the characters whe inhabits are so fully realised, and she's so efficient and polite as a person that it's quite hard to know what she's really like.

RICH: Like, when you actually...we worked with her and she was always a step above us anyway so you always have respect for her a bit so...

STU: I think what Rich is trying to say is that he has too much respect for her to find her attractive!  (LAUGHTER)

RICH: She is, she's strangely...like a big sister or something, y'know, so there's nothing there...

PETE: I think she's nice!  (LAUGHTER)

[NOTE: We sent a copy of the fanzine to all the people it covered.  Shortly thereafter Peter Baynham received a cheque for £250 from Patrick Marber...]

BLETHERINGS FROM THE FORUM:

On The Hour Posted Fri May 5 13:52:13 BST 2000 by Mogwai

Is there any chance that all the offended parties involved in the 'On The Hour' legal wrangles could get together in a group hug and make up so the fucking thing can maybe finally be released? Or is the show destined to languish in the vaults while Armando's horrendously butchered edit continues to be re-released? Is anyone pressing for all this to be sorted out?

You can download most episodes of On the Hour in Real Audio format here:

http://cabinessence.cream.org/oth/

>Is there any chance that all the offended parties involved in the 'On The Hour' legal wrangles could get together in a group hug and make up so the fing thing can maybe finally be released? Or is the show destined to languish in the vaults while Armando's horrendously butchered edit continues to be re-released? Is anyone pressing for all this to be sorted out?

What was deleted from the originals (and also how many were made? - the BBC Radio Collection has only 4 eps)

Another thing - in the opening titles it says 'On Radio 4' - did it say the same when it was broadcast on Radio 1?

>>Is there any chance that all the offended parties involved in the 'On The Hour' legal wrangles could get together in a group hug and make up so the fing thing can maybe finally be released? Or is the show destined to languish in the vaults while Armando's horrendously butchered edit continues to be re-released? Is anyone pressing for all this to be sorted out?
>
>What was deleted from the originals (and also how many were made? - the BBC Radio Collection has only 4 eps)

The BBC release was a two-hour compilation, with material taken from most of the 12 episodes (apart from the very last show - check Edit News for more info). A lot of what got cut was Lee & Herring's stuff - in the first series, (I think - please correct me if I'm wrong but...) they contributed a weekly section called the Pull-Out Section, as if it were an additional newspaper supplement.

These comprised:
Week 1: Get Hip & go!
Style guide very much parodying the Network 7/Def II-type of media nonsense.

Week 2: Colour Supplement
"Five glossy minutes of radio for you to keep all week". Included A Room Of My Own (by a prison inmate), a Peanuts spoof with the tag-line "Taken from the 517th Charles M. Schulz annual "You're Not Funny Anymore, Charlie Brown!", and Keith Floyd's Questionnaire ("What is your favourite crop parasite?").

Week 3: Get A Life!
Very much the original home of Fist Of Fun, this gave you all sorts of stuff to do in your spare time - most of this section (Wormworld, Stylish Names Day in the Lake District, Maltings Texture Afternoon For Kids And Pensioners etc) can be found in the Fist Of Fun book.

There was also a God-bashing pull-out (mostly about trying to make religion groovy in some kind of doomed way), but I don't have show 5 on tape, so I can't remember the pull-out for that week, if there was one. This means I also don't have the wondrous Week Ending desecration called Thank God It's Satire Day (I suspect another L&H contribution - sounded like it was revenge).
I have got a fantastic documentary spoof (again probably by L&H) about Barton's Matches.

I'm not doing most of this stuff justice as most of it was easily as funny as the parts of the show that (justifiably) continue to be lauded. I also hope that everyone involved sorts it out, as it really would be a crime for the complete series to never be heard again.

>
>Another thing - in the opening titles it says 'On Radio 4' - did it say the same when it was broadcast on Radio 1?

I'm not sure about this - was it just a compilation show that Radio 1 broadcast anyway - I didn't hear it. It was New Year '92/93, so the original series was long gone. Anyone catch it?
>

The R1 compilation (December '92) was a 15-minute selection including a couple of brief exclusive links from Morris. It was billed as 'News Banger' and followed the real lunchtime Newsbeat. It also featured the Newsbeat spoof from the Series 2 Feedback parody, albeit without the man complaining about the use of U2 as a collective common noun.

Other sketches in the compilation were Partridge's look back at the sporting year, the 'Free or fried?' Barbara Wintergreen sketch, and the superb Steve Wright 'Talkie bit' parody about endangered animals (with Doon's bit cut for some reason).

Posted By Blake Connolly on Tue May 9 20:59:29 BST 2000:

Just a question about OTH..

In one of the "coming up on Radio 4" bits, there's a preview of Analysis with Mary Goldring. I don't know what episode it's from, but I think it's on side 1 of the tapes.

Anyway, the point is - the joke seems to be one of Morris' cut-up tapes with the sentances and words messed around (like the Call Nick Ross one, or far far funnier, the Archbishop of Canterbury in Blue Jam) but it sounds like Rebecca Front doing the voice. So, do they just sound similar or am I missing something?

>Just a question about OTH..
>
>In one of the "coming up on Radio 4" bits, there's a preview of Analysis with Mary Goldring. I don't know what episode it's from, but I think it's on side 1 of the tapes.
>
>Anyway, the point is - it sounds like Rebecca Front doing the voice. So, do they just sound similar or am I missing something?

I'm sure it is Rebecca Front. The item is (I suspect) a pisstake of the way in which current affairs items have a cliche-ridden way of matching event and consequence. This subverted it. Good item, though. ("Mary Goldring will be in a chair at 7.20", indeed.)

Lee and Herring wrote about a third of the first series and a bit less of the second. As the show was collaborative our contribution went right across the board. We wrote most of the green desks and sport desks (we were not asked to contribute to the Alan Partridge series despite writing much of his early material - though Steve did the work on creating the character which is perhaps most important)

I don't imagine they will re-release the full shows now, though everyone is back on reasonable terms.

>I don't imagine they will re-release the full shows now, though everyone is back on reasonable terms.

Who should we petition to get a full (or fuller re-release)? The BBC?

I must say I didn't realise how many episodes were made until this thread.

Petitioning won't make any difference.

The BBC will already consider that the tape is out and won't want to produce another one. Maybe in 20 years time.

>Petitioning won't make any difference.

Arse.

Re: Petitioning won't make any difference

Your dispondency is irritating, Rich. With a back catalogue as good as yours, you should be actively campaigning to get as much of it released as possible.

Taking the 'well that's just the way it is' attitude is a surefire way to ensure the comedy world is forever run by bland idiots, surely?

For the record, the woman in charge of the comedy releases at BBC Radio Collection (whose name I've forgotten at the moment, but I'll look it up - Mary something) is extremely helpful and friendly, and very sympathetic to fans of radio comedy. Unfortunately, she has to answer to others more boring than her, and she can only push for releases if she has a big bunch of letters from comedy fans in her hand. She says they're desperate for feedback from fans, but don't get nearly enough.

So petition away...

I'd love them to put the tapes out, because I get paid for doing nothing (and I spread pleasure blah blah blah). But long years of experience of the BBC's tape and repeat policy towards us has made me bitter and cynical. I don't think me saying they should release our stuff would help.

>I'd love them to put the tapes out, because I get paid for doing nothing (and I spread pleasure blah blah blah)

That reminds me, in a trail for BBC comedy videos a few years back they showed a clip of 'Fist of Fun' but no video ever appeared, though the concert version did get released by the BBC. Was a video release ever in the pipeline?

The trailer was edited before the gig had been filmed - therefore a clip from FOF was used.

Surely half the reason the series won't get a full release/repeat is because of the PRS, as much as Iannucci's splicing equipment.

For example, consider the war sketch. During one of the reports, Morris says "Crawling from the wreckage" and a clip from a song with that lyric is played in. Just like in the 'Loose Ends' parody.

Could they ever clear Beatles music and all that business? Remember that 'Hitch Hikers' episode got the chop by BBC Radio Collection for the same reason.

By the way, what is that song which "crawling from the wreckage" comes from? I was listening to the original broadcast the other day, and I'm certain it's cut for the released version. Is it Steely Dan maybe?

Yeah but even leaving the PRS stuff out it seems like there's a whole heap of material that could go on release but isn't. This forces the fans to get the episodes off the net instead which denies the On The Hour team money for thier efforts.

Surely the words "The Day Today" alone would make it a commercial success. Well, if the BBC actually learned how to set about selling it's products, anyway.

>
>For example, consider the war sketch. During one of the reports, Morris says "Crawling from the wreckage" and a clip from a song with that lyric is played in. Just like in the 'Loose Ends' parody.
>
It's actually from the Train Trash Traj item at Big Street Station from show 1 (9/8/91), but you're right - Crawling has been cut.

>Could they ever clear Beatles music and all that business? Remember that 'Hitch Hikers' episode got the chop by BBC Radio Collection for the same reason.
>
Shame, though - that Hot Air parody's one of my favourite things in the whole series - that Richard Socks character (Robert Elms, I suspect?), and particularly the repetition of "paperpaperpaperpaperpaperpaperpaper cup" from Across The Universe. Some comedy you just can't analyse. Sorry - I know that's partly what this forum is here for, but this still makes me howl after eight years.

>By the way, what is that song which "crawling from the wreckage" comes from? I was listening to the original broadcast the other day, and I'm certain it's cut for the released version. Is it Steely Dan maybe?

Dave Edmunds, in fact - a minor hit in 1979, and recently covered by Status Quo.