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RICHARD BLACKWOOD
Venue 6 - Lygoe's Den Of Amusement Tickets 556 2765
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Richard is known for his uncompromising routines - ie, a couple of ropy old sets about Monica Lewinsky that Curtis Walker doesn’t want any more, delivered in a vague American accent so that it doesn’t interfere with his plan to become an easily-exportable irony-free rap artist when his chat show gets axed
‘He’s trying to dispel the corny stereotypes people have about the way black people speak. Respect!’ - Junior Simpson
Aug 20 - 28 21.00 (22.30) £10.00 (£8.00)

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Do you hold the unoriginal, knee-jerk view that the songs at the end of 'Smack The Pony' weren’t very good? Well, why not join other Time Out television critics for...
STRENGTH IN NUMBERS
Venue 18 - Scanners Tickets 556 2765
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A unique event, sponsored by the Radio Times
Aug 3 - 17 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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THE PRIORY
Venue 18 - Jacksonroot Drive Tickets 556 2345
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Join Zoe Ball and Jamie Theakston for a special live Edinburgh show featuring special studio guests, music and at least fourteen jokes blatantly lifted from satire shows of the 90s. Watch out for a special appearance by Zoe’s dad Johnny ‘Think Of A Number’ Ball being latently belittled as a sad loser by his daughter and all her glory-hunting fuck-you-media friends, then wonder to yourself if this is actually as low as things can get
Aug 23 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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BADDIEL AND SKINNER - UNPLANNED
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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David Baddiel and Frank Skinner present a show for which they’ve planned absolutely nothing. Well, apart from those warm-up shows
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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BADDIEL AND SKINNER'S VARIOUS SECRETARIES - UNPLANNED
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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A special live showcase for that steady stream of absolute and total dickbrained twats who managed to convince themselves they were funny or entertaining in some way.
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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THODAY AND ALLEN-TURNER - UNPLANNED
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 4875
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Jon Thoday and Richard Allen-Turner present a TV contract, the finer details of which they obviously haven’t thought through
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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A TEENAGE PREGNANCY - UNPLANNED
Back Home - London, Tickets 0171 556 7265
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A comedy groupie leafs through the recent Edinburgh Fringe Guide checking the dates of performance against how many days she's actually late...
Sept 23 17.00 (17.30) £10.00 (£5.00)

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MY PICK OF THE PERRIER - WITH ALISON GRAHAM
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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Radio Times’ very own angry young thing takes us on a journey through who she thinks will win the coveted award despite it being absolutely nothing to do with her whatsoever. Be amused as Alison hotly tips anybody she assumes might possibly be halfway popular in the public eye yet refuses adamantly to swallow
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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A NAKED WOMAN DANCING TO A CASSETTE OF BARTOK
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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Yeah - that joke. Described in the Arts section as a living portrayal of one woman’s fight to come to terms with her own sense of shame and being, this is actually just a naked woman dancing to a cassette of Bartok. And unfortunately we’re too worried about the amount of tape-hiss reverberating from the cheap sound system in the venue to concentrate on pubes
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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THAT BLOKE WHO USED TO SET FIRE TO HIS ARSE IN THE 80s
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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He’s back! That bloke who used to set fire to his arse in the 80s returns to Edinburgh to set fire to his arse
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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ALISON GOLDIE in
WHO AM I EXACTLY?
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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The ridiculous actress explains why appearing in one episode of 'The Mary Whitehouse Experience' means she’s an obvious choice for a Channel 5 documentary about her wanking habits
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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THE BEST OF COMEDY
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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Introduced by Dave Gorman - the Pete Best of Comedy
'No, you're wrong, he's lovely. Don't you realise comedy is subjective? And who's Pete Best anyway?' - Cutesy Gigglegush (Aged 14)
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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JOHNNY VEGAS
Venue 256 - McIbiza Tickets 556 1878
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Fat fuck
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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I PREFER CHOCOLATE TO SEX ANYDAY!
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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Are you a woman who thinks saying ‘I prefer chocolate to sex anyday’ is the most original witticism ever? Well, why not join other boring people for a great evening out? You can say ‘I prefer chocolate to sex anyday’ as many times as you like, in the company of other bland individuals who will all laugh annoyingly afterwards and then pull a wry face
‘Why is a vibrator good at cutting the grass? Becau...oh, hang on, I’ve got that wrong.’ - Cosmopolitan
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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THE LAWRENCE SUSPECTS
Venue 19 - Hesitant, 60 The Hesitant Tickets 5562098
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The men accused of murdering black teenager Stephen Lawrence return to their first love - stand-up.
Aug 5 - 24 20.00 (21.00) £5.00 (£4.00)

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MOUSE MATT
'Marjorie's' - Venue 78 Tickets 556 2765
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Matt Lucas unveils a new character
Aug 28 - 29 18.00 (18.45) £5.00 (£4.00)

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BJORN TO BE WILD
Venue 24 - Fernando's, Waterloo Tickets 556 2765
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A comedian presents a show about his teenage fixation on Abba as if this is in some way original
'Yep, this pretty much defines our folklore...’ - Gay News
Aug 2 - 30 22.00 (22.45) £4.00 (£3.00)

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KICK JANE ROOT UP THE CUNT
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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Queue up with thousands of like-minded people and kick Jane Root up the cunt. See if that does the trick
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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Punt & Dennis in
THE EDUCATION EXPERIENCE
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2295
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Do you hold the opinion that Punt & Dennis are, and always have been, crap? Well, come along to The Pleasant to hear episodes of the original radio version of The Mary Whitehouse Experience and witness your boring, point-scoring, Johnny-come-lately, wrong opinions crumbling before your very ears
‘La la, la la - we can’t hear you...’ - Lee & Herring, Time Out, most people, etc
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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IAN COGNITO in
I HATE EVERYTHING
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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What will he say next? Probably a long rant about how he hates all religions, but with the emphasis on Christianity and Buddhism rather than Judaism and Islam, because, y’know, he might be dangerous but he’s got to be careful, you know what I mean
‘Sick’ - Ricky Gervais
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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FEY LUCAS
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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Matt Lucas reminisces about old 'Grange Hill' characters in a laid-back, disinterested manner
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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BILL BAILEY in
SEX ‘N’ KEBABS ‘N’ ROCK ‘N’ ROLL

Calders Gilded Balloon, the whoo venue Tickets 556 1099
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The long-haired troubadour will be enjoying the festival in his unique way - ie, by selfishly doing a line of coke in a nightclub kitchen completely oblivious to the fact that people have to prepare food in there later on. Special guest: Mitch Benn
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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A LOCAL PLAY FOR LOCAL PEOPLE
Venue 43 - 'Patty's', Friedriech Rise Tickets 556 2765
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Darker and more surreal than ever. Those Gentlemen from 'The League Of Gentlemen' take to the stage. So if you’re dismayed that nobody seems to like Red Dwarf anymore why not get all your mates around to turn this once entertaining show into a bland fad too by squealing at all the pleb-bound 'sick' bits. The evening culminates with Gatiss, Sheersmith and the other one insulting the intelligence of their audience even further by explaining the 'complicated' ideas behind jokes that even a tiny child would understand and attempting to model their entire career path on that of the Pythons in the space of a single year.
'Papa Lazarou - yeah, he'll do' - Hero Finders Monthly
Aug 14 21.00 (22.30) Free

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DAVID WALLIAMS in
MY PARENTS COULDN’T SPELL WILLIAMS
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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'Oy!' - John Lloyd
Aug 2 - 22 20.00 (21.00) £10.00 (£9.00)

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STEVEN MOFFAT
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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The writer of ‘Coupling’ and ‘Joking Apart’ tells us what life is like on his planet
Aug 27 21.00 (22.00) £5.00 (£4.00)

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THAT BLOKE WHO DOES THE WARM UP FOR BADDIEL & SKINNER
Venue 33 - Pleasant, 60 The Pleasant Tickets 556 2765
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Coming across like a cross between Harry Hill, Lee Evans and Jimmy Cricket, that bloke who did the warm up for Baddiel & Skinner is back to delight audiences who are into Harry Hill, Lee Evans and Jimmy Cricket. And he has a suitcase of elaborate props too like that ‘Amazing Jonathan’ bloke from America. And when he's used them all up he does a load of painful one-liners like Tim Vine. In short, about as original as the concept of air
Aug 3 - 26 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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WOODY ALLEN, ROB NEWMAN and RICHARD HERRING in
OH, WHY CAN’T WE GET GIRLFRIENDS?
Venue 33 - Present, 60 The Present Tickets 556 8655
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Three comedians do a lot of self-deprecating material about how they can’t get off with anyone, even though they clearly can
Aug 20 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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SPECIFICS
Venue 33 - Pleasure, 60 The Pleasure Tickets 556 7474
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Do you think Jack Dee is brilliant because of his 'dry' sense of humour? Do you rate The Two Ronnies' 'Fork Handles' sketch as possibly their best work? Do you laugh loudly at the 'comedy bits' in Eastenders? Did you think the idea of lowering the age of consent for gay men amounted to 'political correctness gone doollally'? Do you hate all black people but don't mind Lenny Henry because 'he makes you laugh?' Are you really pleased that England beat Germany recently because it's been a long time coming? Do you think Tony Blair is about to sell this country down the river to Europe? Do you spend most of the summer wandering around the place in nothing except a child's cotton nightie that's far too short and shows off your twat and dangling bloodied tampon string whenever you reach into the fridge for a bottle of water? Then you must be my flatmate Rebecca Nicholson. Bung the kettle on, will you?
Aug 20 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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TWO FAT WOMEN IN TIGHT DRESSES SINGING SONGS
Venue 33 - Pleasure, 60 The Pleasure Tickets 556 7474
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Self Explanatory
Aug 10 - 29 21.00 (22.00) £7.00 (£6.00)

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ARE YOU ALIVE?
Venue 83 - Willow Road, Forum Street Tickets 556 7498
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The annual 'Next Level Down' season continues with some nonentity who watched Dave Gorman's attempts to become famous and now thinks 'Aha - that'll do me!'
Also at the Fringe this year: 'Are You Affected By Gravity?; 'Are You Within My Travelling Budget?'; 'Are You Willing To Have The Piss Taken Out Of You If You Don't Fancy Playing Along?' and 'Are You A Producer With No Understanding Of Comedy And A Fat Contract'. 
'Are you an unfunny black comedienne with a face like a prune?' - Gina Yashere
'Are You Sixteen Yet?' - (censored for legal reasons)
Aug 2 - 26 20.00 (21.00) £7.00 (£7.00)

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To celebrate the long-awaited release of hitherto-banned cinema classics like A Clockwork Orange and The Exorcist, why not come along and endure once more
EVERYONE’S STUPID FUCKING OPINIONS
Venue 3 - Up Parsons’ Arse Tickets 556 0987
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Aug 4, 5, 8, 19
10.00 (22.00) £6.00 (£5.00)

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INNES OWN TROUSERS
Venue 97 - 'Ready Mades', World Road Tickets 556 2765
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Ex-Bonzo Dog and Python collaborator Neil Innes presents a one-man show with reminiscences and songs from his illustrious career, marred only by a certain Christopher Morris in the audience who will talk very loudly to some short cunt in a cap about how great Peter Cook was until someone very kindly leans over and tells them both to shut the fuck up
Aug 2 - 30 19.00 (20.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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THOMPSON & VENABLES
Venue 4 - Worrabout Jaymee's Peeaaarents'  Tickets 556 1982
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The scouser scamps return to their first love - stand-up.
Aug 6 - 30 21.00 (22.00) £15.00 (£14.00)

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WOWIE DOWIE
(UNCONFIRMED)

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SGT PEPPERDINE’S LONELY HEARTS CLUB VICKI
(CANCELLED)

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PHILL JUPITUS
Venue 33 - Whoring, In The Red Tickets 556 2765
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A man inserts some rabbis into a flat pocket of bread
‘Oh no, it’s that kind of ‘fill Jew pittas’ - Gilbert Ratchet, Viz
July 30 - Aug 27 12.00 (23.00) £30 (£27)

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THE GREAT BIG CLUB
Venue 14 - McPlebs, Jacksonroot Drive Tickets 556 2765
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The Ministry of Sound and Boy George are the resident DJs for a week of special rave events specially commissioned by Kevin Lygoe to keep their unimaginative Channel 4 documentaries fed with shots of malnourished blokey twats in shades and infantile gormless women lifting up their tops to camera in a way that suggests that growing a pair of freckly tits is their greatest achievement. Meanwhile, over in Ibiza, some sunburnt women laugh at a vibrator
'Ohhhhh, fuck off and read a book' - Some Of The Corpses Are Amusing
Aug 20, 22 & 30 21.00 (4.00) £15.00 (£10.00)

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PICK OF THE FRINGE
Assembly Rooms, Wherever, Etcetera Tickets 556 2765
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Well, that's the good thing about living in a democracy. You get a choice...
Aug 30 21.00 (22.00) £12.00 (£11.00)

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PRICK OF THE FRINGE
Assembly Hall - Yah Yah Drive Tickets 556 2765
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Chris Addison.
Aug 12 - 27 20.00 (21.00) £5.00 (£4.00)

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PICK OF THE BINGE
Pleasance Courtyard - The Gutter Tickets 556 2765
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Richard Herring gets incredibly drunk with his mates and makes a complete pottery tit of himself singing 'Don't Look Back In Anger' at some Karaoke party. Then he sobers up and moans about how he always loses money when he goes to Edinburgh.
Aug 30 21.00 (22.00) £12.00 (£11.00)

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PICK OF THE HINGE
Krenshaw Utensil's Ugly Daughter - Queen Street
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The 'Hinge' one out of Hinge And Bracket takes us through all the bits of the act that he wrote
Aug 30 21.00 (22.00) £12.00 (£11.00)

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PICK OF THE MINGE

Venue 66 - Little Perks, Princess Street Tickets 556 2765
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A comedy groupie sneezes, drenching her friends with the rancid spunk of a dozen up-and-coming comedians, all tipped for the top
Aug 30 17.00 (17.45) £5.00 (£4.00)

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THE NATIONAL EDINBURGH FILM AND TELEVISION THEATRE FESTIVAL

Kermode's - King Buxton's Blue World Tickets 556 1987
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NatWest or someone sponsors
SO YA WANNA MAKE MOVIES...?
A new opportunity for innovative young film-makers who like to completely misunderstand why most people enjoy watching films. The prize will be awarded to something completely tedious which nonetheless fits into some kind of ‘dark’ remit much beloved by the kind of reference-hunting wankers who sycophantically refer to film directors by their surnames. The booby prize will be awarded to anyone who just films a good story normally. Tickets available on the mantelpiece, behind the complete David Lynch video collection.
Aug 1 - 30 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY SIMPSONS
This year marks the 1,000th time the BBC have screened the mediocre third-series episode 'Boy Scoutz N The Hood'. To celebrate this momentous piece of television history, the BBC will be screening the mediocre third-series episode 'Boy Scoutz N The Hood'. Aug 16 21.30 (22.00) Free

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THE FOUR FILM REVIEW SHOW
A selection of special film premieres live from the Edinburgh Festival Film Four Film Festival on Four (C4). Introduced by the bloke who actually committed the crime which Johnny Vaughan purportedly did time in prison for. Aug 4 - 29 21.00 (22.45) Free

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RICHARD HERRING WRITES A NOTE TO THE MILKMAN ALL THE WAY FROM FIJI
The Cheddar playwright spends all the money he's earned this year on a nice holiday for himself and his mates before his management has a chance to spend it all on whores and drugs. Aug 20 Free (paid for by NBC/Fox/Gates America)

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Channel 5 presents KIDDIE PORN SEASON
For the first time in 25 years, a chance to see some notorious, classic British child porn from the 1970s. Recoil in shock as the films turn out to have proper plots and star people like Dandi Nichols, Pamela Stephenson and various stray members of Tony Blair’s extended family.
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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JOHN O’FARRELL & PETE SINCLAIR
Two bland men bumbling along until they can write a hit sitcom, sell it to the States, then contract out the writing so they don’t have to bother any more. ‘And me, don’t forget me!’ - Dan Patterson
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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LAURENCE MARKS & MAURICE GRAN
The duo responsible for 'Goodnight Sweetheart' and 'Birds of a Feather' talk about what makes great comedy. Other people, mainly. Every night, in a slightly cold room.
Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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Sacha Baron Cohen presents
DA RETURN OF ALI G
The derivative, badly-realised character is joined by a series of politicians who all respond completely reasonably and intelligently to his questions and clearly realise it’s a joke thing anyway. Plus, the unveiling of his new character: Nobby the Nigger.
Aug 3 21.00 (22.00) £9.00 (£7.00)

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EDINBURGH OR BUST
Channel 4 present an impartial look at the best Edinburgh comedy, in association with whatever Karen Koren decides will give her the best publicity. Featuring vox pops galore, so long as they say nice things. The series will end with slow-motion footage of a comedian collecting some pathetic little plastic cup from a non-existent award committee so the series can end on a high note. Note: Audiences must enter the venue in time-lapse speed, and then exit looking sweaty and going ‘absolutely brilliant’
‘It’s Friday night, and newcomer Jon Reed is...ow, who threw that?’ - Jenny Eclair
Throughout The Festival Free

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SOUTH PARK Stage version of the popular over-rated student fad that’s quite funny in places until you realise you’re not watching anything particularly original or exciting when it all comes down to it. The evening ends with a load of songs which turn out to be absolutely incredible but which journalists will claim spoils the whole event. Cunts.
‘Sick’ - Richard Herring
Followed by:
TREY & MATT - FROM SOUTH PARK TO NOWHERE
Trey Parker and Matt Stone present a short season of all their other work which nobody cares about because in hasn’t got Cartman in it saying his catchphrase. Don’t miss this unique opportunity to see Trey and Matt in person claiming that they’re so bloody counter-cultural and subversive to have gotten ‘South Park’ on the air despite the fact that somewhere along the line they must have sat in a Comedy Central studio manager’s office wearing suits and smiling politely at pie charts and potential overseas sales figures.
Aug 4 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£8.00)

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FRIENDS Preview showings of the popular children's series This year: 'The One Where Ross Fucks Off' Aug 28 - 29 21.00 (23.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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THE NATIONAL EDINBURGH FILM AND TELEVISION THEATRE FESTIVAL PRESENTS ‘AN EVENING WITH THE GOODIES’ A treat for comedy fans. The evening kicks off with a question and answer session with the three surviving members during which Bill Oddie will giggle a lot, Tim Brooke-Taylor will be fey and Graeme Garden will be an obstinate old swine who dismisses their entire work as a bit childish. After which there will be special showings of the episodes ‘The Movies’ and ‘Goodies Rule OK’ which will stun those audience members who bacng on about The Boosh being innovative and exciting into rigid, amazed silence. At the climax of the show BBC2 controller Jane Root will come on stage and attempt to explain why The Goodies wouldn’t be of interest to today’s comedy watchers, and the entire audience will rush the stage and kick her up the cunt. Goody Goody Yum Yum.
Aug 14 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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THE KEVIN LYGOE LECTURE Kevin Lygoe, once Channel 4's golden boy of Entertainment, now at Channel 5, presents his vision of a better broadcasting Britain while Sacha Baron Cohen translates it into 'street-speak' for the plebs and a woman with no bra and enormous breasts jogs on the spot to whatever happens to be number one in the Pepsi chart that week.
Aug 15 21.00 (22.45) £7.00 (£6.50)

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THE NATIONAL EDINBURGH FILM AND TELEVISION THEATRE FESTIVAL PRESENTS ‘AN EVENING WITH JIMMY MULVILLE’ (Cancelled)

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BLAND FilmFour

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THE RICHARD CURTIS LECTURE A rare chance to hear Richard Curtis, award-winning writer of 'The Vicar Of Dibley' and 'Four Weddings And A Funeral' explaining his unique working method - every time Emma Freud fellates him, another bit of his talent gets sucked out.
Aug 28 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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Someone Good in
SOMETHING SHIT
...because they've just received a huge tax bill.
Aug 23 21.00 (21.30) £10.00 (£8.00)

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THE NATIONAL EDINBURGH FILM AND TELEVISION THEATRE PRESENTS 'AN EVENING WITH WILDMAN FISCHER'
Merry Go Round, doo doo doo doo...
Aug 28 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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TAKEOVER TV The final vote, live from the Fringe.  Do you have what it takes to do something a bit kitch, amateur and half-hearted to be chosen for this show?  Hey - it worked for Adam & Joe!
Aug 19 20.00 (21.00) £5.00 (£4.00) 

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MINI BROTHER
A new collaboration between Endemol and Channel 4 - eight children are shut up in a room for two months while an E4-viewing public scrutinise their every move. Expect Lord Of The Flies style battles as the kids play kisschase, pull each other's hair and fill their pants with crap. A unique social experiment.
'Yeah, and if you sort of half-squint you can see right up them' - Gary Carter, Endemol Entertainment
'I find myself rushing home from work to see whether little Sally's nose has stopped bleeding yet' - Charlie Brooker
'We wrote this joke last year, incidentally' - SOTCAA

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PLAY UK PRESENTS 'THE HOLOCAUST' Special preview screening of a specially commissioned Play UK documentary about the appalling atrocities of Second World War Nazi concentration camps, relieved every few minutes by the latest pop videos from Steps and Travis.
Aug 27 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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FILM NIGHT - WITH RICHARD HERRING (Cancelled due to lack of interest)

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MEDIA URBAN MYTHS

Venue 56 - Iain's Scouthut Tickets 556 2765
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Do you know a great juicy story about a well-known celebrity? Do you mistakenly believe you’re the one of the elite few who are important enough to be trusted with the information? Have you heard the story about Debbie McGee being fucked by an alsation? Well, come along and view this unique display of things everyone knows anyway. Every night at The Pleasant, introduced by the bloke who actually did the crime Johnny Vaughan purportedly went to prison for. Prize for the most convincing anecdote - the cocaine from Diana’s handbag and a night out with Jim Davidson. Presented by Jools Holland and the late Queen Mother.
‘Free tickets for me, or the kids get it!’ - Kate Adie
Aug 7 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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THE JEFF IS ALWAYS GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE
(NO WAY)

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JASPER CARROTT presents

FUNKY MOPED

DJM's - Rhomann's Pen Tickets 556 2765
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Live from the Boggery, a unique event - for the first time since 1975, a load of wanky-opinioned journalists actually listen to Carrott’s top ten hit all the way through several times. The evening ends with them realising it was actually a great song and they’ve been lying to each other all these years. They will then amend their ‘Worst Records Of All Time’ lists and start slagging off 'The Chicken Song' instead, even though that was a fucking parody as well.
‘Faintly bobble hat time...’ - Jasper Carrott
Aug 5 - 29 21.00 (22.45) £10.00 (£9.00)

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DWIGHT BERTYWERTY-SCHMUCKBERG III Jnr in

GODDAM IT, SCHODDAM IT
Barney's Laffter Hut - McFleeceberg, Idaho Tickets 556 2765
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So, what is the deal with these drive-in Twinkies, etc...

Aug 12 - 20 22.00 (23.30) £5.00 (£4.00)

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© 2000 - 2002 some of the corpses are amusing